Insane

Let's Get This Party Started

"So do you know where we can find them?" Natsu asked.

"Of course! Who do you think I am?" Lucy picked up a loose sheet of paper that was lying on the table and asked for a pen. She wrote an address and slid the paper towards Natsu. As soon as he reached for it, she pulled it away.

"When you find them, as soon as they're done with their job, you let them go. No strings attached. You can't throw hem in jail. You let. Them. Go." Lucy glared at Natsu, him looking like he wasn't going to break.

"I'm telling you where they are for the price of their invincibility. You won't touch them. They may be criminals but they're my friends. I would never do anything that would put my friends in jeopardy. So I am asking once again, if I give you this address, you won't arrest them, right?"

After mulling it over, Natsu managed to grind out a "yes".

"Great!" Lucy pushed the paper toward him. "Here you go."

"So when are we gonna start the training? I'm assuming you're going to send your people to go get them first thing tomorrow, so will we be able to do it tomorrow?" Lucy looked at Natsu expectantly.

"We'll have a car to take us to our secluded training grounds."

"Hooray." The sarcasm was clear in her voice.

The Next Day

A key made its way to its designated hole and twisted, unlocking the steel door that locked a criminal away from the rest of the world.

"Rise and shine, Heartfilia! It's 6 a.m and time to get up. We're headed to the training grounds now. Everybody is already downstairs waiting. Get up!"

Natsu turned on the lights  and noticed that there was an unmoving blob underneath the covers. Natsu sighed and walked towards her, poking and jabbing away at her until she spoke.

"Go away, pinky."

"No."

"Uggghhhhh! I hate life." Lucy grumbled as she sat up, wrapping the sheet around her. "I went to sleep in my workout clothes because I knew this was gonna happen."

Lucy got up, sheet still around her and turned towards Natsu. "Are my things going to be there?"

"If by things, you mean your weapons, then yes."

"Hoorah."

As they made their way down the stairs, Lucy noticed that her "teammates" were up and ready to go, looking way to happy and chirpy than they should at 6 a.m.

"You guys suck."

"Ditto."

With Erza's last word, they made their way outside and into the black SUV.

The car ride was silent except for the small banter between the agents and Lucy's silent snores.

Lisanna turned towards her and shook her head with disgust. "How can she take her sheet and sleep in the car like a child and not feel any shame?"

Juvia shrugged. "I guess it's just one of the benefits of not having a moral compass."

Erza nodded. "True. But if you really think about it, it isn't her fault she's this crazy. How do you think you would turn out if what happened to her happened to you? She honestly could've turned out worse."

"She could've killed us all by now, if she really wanted to," Gray added.

"Hn."

The rest of the ride was filled with a comfortable silence, occasionally being broken by Lucy's soft snores.

When they finally got to the training grounds, they decided to let Lucy sleep a little while longer while they stretched and got everything settled.

"Okay, now I think it's time to wake the bum up," Gray said while jogging in place.

"Yeah," Natsu said as he made his way towards the car door. As soon as he was within five feet of the door, the door shot open and Lucy stepped out of the car. She shed her sheet and crumpled it up into a ball, throwing it into the car and shutting the door.

What was once under the cover was a Lucy wearing a gray tank top and black shorts. She peeled off a hair tie from her wrist and twisted her hair into a sturdy bun.

"Let's get this party started! Whoop!"

With way more energy than she had earlier, she jumped up and did a couple cartwheels around the field, eventually falling on her back.

"Oh, it's been a long time since I've been outside, near nature. And it feels great!" Lucy said with an impression of Tony the Tiger, elongating the 'great'.

While Lucy lay relaxed on the ground, they gang got to take a good look at her. They noticed she had horrible burns on both her thighs and subtle scars on her throat.

Without thinking, Gray asked, "What's up with your thighs?"

Lucy visibly stiffened and Natsu smacked Gray on the back of his head. Lucy brushed it off and played it off like it was nothing.

"That b@stard Hotchner poured gasoline on my thighs then set them on fire. Can you believe the nerve of that dude? Setting me on fire, pfft."

Everyone stared wide eyed at Lucy's unmoving body, and then turned to look at each other. How could she survive being burned like that? They didn't expect the torture she went through to be that horrible.

"So anyways, who's ready to get so sore that you won't be able to move for a long time?"

Expressionless faces met her. "Well then."

Lucy turned to Natsu, who was supervising the training session, and asked, "Where's my stuff?"

Natsu moved to the trunk of the SUV and took out a large duffle bag. He tossed it toward Lucy, which she caught with an "oomph".

Lucy opened the bag and laughed delightedly as she saw all her old weapons. She took out her beloved gun and everyone waited to see what she was gonna do with it. She took the safety off and pointed the gun at Lisanna's head.

"SON OF A BIT-"

"Relax, albino rat! It's not like I can do anything with it. They're not gonna give me a loaded gun. See?"

Lucy pointed her gun upwards and pulled the trigger.

A loud a crack resonated throughout the field as Lucy watched the bullet fly with wide eyes.

"Holy sh!t! You idiots actually gave me a loaded gun!"

Natsu looked at her. "And we trust that you'll use it responsibly. Or else," he motioned to his neck, as if referring to the bomb that was uncomfortably wrapped around hers.

Lucy's eye twitched. "Or else my a$$," she mumbled under her breath.

"Now, back to my previous question. How's ready to get this party started?!"