Suicidal

F i v e

I sit down on the little twin bed that had white sheets neatly lied out.
It squeaks and I hear a laugh from the door.
I turn around and laugh when I see Max laughing at the funny noise the old bed made.

I stand up and it makes the same noise.
Which makes us laugh more.
"Megan, shhhh!" He jokes.
"No clue!" I put my hands up in defense.

*

After dinner Max and I sit down in the small, yet comfortable living room.
We had decided to watch a movie.
"Hey, Megan?" Max asks, in the middle of the movie.

"Yes?" I look up to him from my spot on the other side of the couch.
"I was thinking that we could go down to the city about 45 minutes from here tomorrow? but if you don't want to, we don't have to!" He looks down as his hands in fright of me saying no.

"Ok that sounds fun." I smile as his face lights up with happieness and excitement.
Max has always been a city boy, and he knew I was more of a country girl.
But if he wanted to go into the city, let's go into the city!

*

I run and run as fast as I can, but I can't seem to get out. This dark endless hallway swallows me up and I could still hear the voices of hateful kids.

"She's such an ugly bitch."

"She should transfer."

"Why does SHE have to be in my classes?!"

"Id rather be dead than talk to her."

"Eww! she is so disgusting!!"

"Watch where you're going you crazy bitch."

"Die."

"Just kill yourself!!"

I scream and scream in pain, mental pain obviously.

"STOP!! STOP IT!! AHHH!!!" I yell at the top of my lungs.

"Megan, Megan! Wake up!" Max shakes me out of my nightmare.

"Are you ok? You were screaming. Is everything alright?" Max asks sitting on the side of my bed.
"I-i'm ok. j-just a nightmare." I look down and see I have been sweating.

"Do you want to talk about it? It could make you feel better."  Max lightly brushes some of my hair out of my face with his finger.

"Could you just stay with me? I don't want to be alone." I ask him quietly.
He smiles slightly and lays down with me.

He hugs me tightly in his arms and I close my eyes.
He kisses my temple lightly
The names I have been called in the past were ringing through my head, so it took me a while to fall asleep.

*

I wake up to find that I was alone in bed, where did Max go?
I get up and go into the kitchen, finding him making some food.

"Hey!" I smile.
"Hey, umm." He gives me a smile, but it never reached his eyes. He looked really sad.

"What's wrong?" I ask, and sit down on the barstool at the kitchen island.

"H-how long?" He asks.
His arms just hung from his sides, he didn't seem mad, just. Sad.
Maybe a little disappointed?

"How long what?"

"Come on Meg, you know what I'm taking about."
I could tell he was getting a little frustrated but again, I stood there clueless.

"Max, what are you talking about?" I ask.
He walks over and lightly grabs my wrist a bit higher than the cuts.