Chapter 11: Points Proven

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The Sanctuary had been my home now for four total days, though it still had yet to feel like it. I had grown used to my surroundings more or less and didn't need Negan or his men to escort me around base anymore. So thanks to this I was able to have a lot of "me" time. 

It seemed like Negan was always busy dealing with an issue of some sort and his men weren't given too many breaks, so half the time I was the only one around here with nothing to do. I was kind of like a Princess in a castle. Negan being the dictating King and every one surrounding hard at work to please him. Which was odd, I was used to working. In Ricks group, everyone was to contribute. That's just how everything went. I spent hours out gardening our few crops or repairing barricades, just doing something to help. Now, I spent the entirety of my days doing absolutely nothing.

Currently I was sat on the cement steps, these steps were slowly growing to be my favorite spot. I leaned against the ramp, kicking my feet out on the step and observing everything around me. All the bustling workers, the walkers in the cage to my left, the sounds of birds chirping in the distance. It was oddly beginning to feel familiar.

Negan had so willingly lent me a couple books that some of his guys found lying around. I would read anything to keep me from drowning in boredom. Yes, having no work was quite a relaxing change, but it let me feeling unwhole. As if I should be up and getting stuff done rather than reading Twelth Night  on the staircase. 

"That a good book?" 

I glance up from the abstract pages to find my friend Nigel now standing over me. 

I nod, "Gives me something to do" I close the book, folding a corner to mark the page I was on, "You like Shakespeare?"

He chuckles, sinking down to the steps above me. 

"To be or not to be" He recites and I laugh at his typical ways. 

"Is that all you know of the speech?" I question and Nigel nods, pulling a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket.

"Never was too big a fan of Hamlet, I liked King Leer though," he informs me, pulling a lighter from the front of his jeans and putting a flame to the cig.

I watch as he inhales, then leisurely blowing out the smoke. He takes notice of myself starring at him.

"Oh I'm sorry," he holds out the pack, "Want one?"

I hesitate before shaking my head, "Nah, there's no treatment for lung cancer out there anymore so I'd rather not risk it" I jokingly say, but there was a bit of truth to that statement.

He nods in understanding, "The way I see it, we're all bound to die one day. Perhaps suffering from lung cancer would be better than being eating alive by the walking dead, but maybe that's a personal preference." 

I burst into genuine laughter at his comment, himself doing the same. His blue eyes crinkling up from the impact of his wide smile. 

Once our laughter dies down, it's silent, both of us contemplating each others words. 

"It's crazy to think about" I break the silence, my eyes turning up towards Nigel, "To think we're all going to die one day."

He nods, "Yeah, deaths weird like that" he sighs, heavily contemplating on something, "just lost my brother a couple months ago, still doesn't feel real though."

My heart went out to Nigel, but I knew how it felt to lose family too, so I could very much relate.

"I know how you feel. Everyone that I've lost due to this damned apocalypse were people I wouldn't have met if it wasn't for it. They all were strangers at one point and they all became my family over time. But every loss hit hard."

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