Dear Josh. (a Joshler fanfic) ✔️

Day 5.

Dear Josh,

You had a good night. Your heart rate stayed the same, your breaths are evenly.

I'm happy you had a good night.

I'm currently laying on the couch next to your bed with this laptop on my lap.

It took me years to realize why a laptop is named a laptop. It sits on your lap. Of course it's called a laptop.

Anyways, the couch is right under a big window. I opened the curtains, if you don't mind.

The sun is coming up and the sky is pink. Reminds me of your hair right now; faded pink.

Beautiful, yet it makes me sad. When you wake up, we should dye your hair.

Another color. Blue maybe. Or yellow. Yellow is a happy color. It'd suit you so amazing.

'Cause pink now makes me sad, because it reminds me of the car crash. Your hair was pink when it happened. Your hair is pink right now, when you're in a coma.

So you better wake up soon, so I can dye your hair for you.

You're gonna wake up, right?

I hope you are.

I'm gonna sing you another song today. It's called In Your Arms by Chef'Special.

I probably shouldn't be singing this to you right now. It's about someone who died.

And you haven't died just yet.

It's not your time just yet.

We need to live, Josh. We have a whole life planned out, remember?

We need to adopt kids and raise them together. We need to grow old and gray and sit in wheelchairs together, holding hands.

It's not your time yet, Josh.

Please don't die.

I need you.

It's so hard here without you. I love you so much.

I might go grab some breakfast at the restaurant downstairs today. I don't want to bother the nurses and have them make me breakfast and lunch and dinner every day.

The song I'm gonna sing to you today keeps replaying in my head.

"From the day that I met you, I stopped feeling afraid. In your arms, I feel safe. In your arms, I feel safe. I miss you so, I miss you so. I'll miss you until I'm old."

It's true, Josh. If you don't wake up, then this song will be so true.

"I know that you are with me and I know that you're at peace."

It's making me cry.

I'm crying right now.

Again.

Wow. I can't seem to stop crying ever since day 1. And it had been so long since I cried.

But that's because I was with you, Josh. And you taught me not to cry. You taught me that we would be able to survive everything together.

But now, you can't tell me that.

And now, I'm crying.
And I've never cried as hard as I do now, Josh.

Please wake up soon.
I miss you, and this is killing me. I love you.

I'll wait for you,

Your Love.