Don't Fucking Ask

Reasons why I'm a fail (yey)

(Dedicated to #lifestrugglesman )

When you take the perfect selfie but the unflushed toilet is in the way. Unobservant.

When you jump into your friend's lap because some asshole sits next to you and you yell "AIDS!" Bitch.

When your friend goes through all of your smut you had screenshotted on your phone. LOL.

When you snort in class to try to get some guys' attention and everyone is looking at you but him. SNORT.

When you run down the hall going "My precious" and flipping your ring around when someone called you golumn. Or however you spell it. Immature.

When the teacher asks, "Why did you scratch out the directions?" And you say, "I didn't, I just highlighted it with my pencil." Smartass.

When you cuss in front of the teacher and she says watch your mouth, and you yell, "Fuck I'm sorry!" Smartasssssss.

When you have a locker next to someone you used to like and when he messes around with you you want to mess back but you end up standing in front of them and their locker awkwardly and staring at them with a red face and wide eyes, holding your breath and shaking. Awkward.

When you go to school dressed like a school girl and don't even realize it until some guy points it out with a wink. Don't care what I wear.

When you sit with your emo friends and you all argue over who has to speak in front of the class for about 5 minutes. Introvert.

W̶h̶e̶n̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶'̶t̶ ̶e̶v̶e̶n̶ ̶m̶a̶i̶n̶t̶a̶i̶n̶ ̶a̶ ̶r̶e̶l̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶s̶h̶i̶p̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶ ̶o̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶ ̶m̶o̶n̶t̶h̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶e̶n̶d̶ ̶u̶p̶ ̶f̶u̶c̶k̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶3̶ ̶g̶u̶y̶s̶ ̶i̶n̶ ̶a̶ ̶w̶e̶e̶k̶.̶ ̶A̶n̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶'̶v̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶l̶d̶ ̶n̶o̶ ̶o̶n̶e̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶c̶l̶o̶s̶e̶s̶t̶ ̶f̶r̶i̶e̶n̶d̶s̶.̶ ̶W̶h̶o̶r̶e̶.̶ OKAY I MIGHT NOT WANT TO SHARE THAT WITH EVERYONE.

When you lose your best friend on New Year's because you said the word "Nigga." The fucked up people i used to hang with.

Trust me, there's more. I didn't want this to be like a 5000 word essay, so I cut down some of the reasons I'm a fail. Needless to say, I am a fail. I've done all of these. comment the weird things youve done and maybe (just maybe) I'll feel better about my own shitty life.