Islands

30. The Island of Animals

I rolled over and groaned as the sun beamed down on my eyes, slipping past the tiny curtain that covered the tiny window of the cabin.
Yes, I knew I shouldn't be here. It wasn't my boat, but fuck Mads for having loud sex in the room beside mine with some girl.

I curl up, cold, tired, and in pain from sleeping on the terrible mattress. I pulled the blanket over me tightly. My body ached wanting nothing more than to feel the way I felt the last time I was on this boat. I wanted to feel free and loved. I wanted to feel his hands and his body. I wanted him, but I hated him for how me made me hurt. The pain in my chest has been unbearable last night. Sleep last night was an impossible task, one that was resolved after crying into my hands for several hours.

I felt the boat slightly shake and I jolted up. I needed to hide. Under the bed? No. In a cabinet? No.
Fuck! It was too late. The tall danish man already knew I was here. I could sense anger as he approached the ladder to the cabin.

"What in the hell are you doing? Sneaking off like this!" Mads yelled when he climbed down the ladder.
I opened my mouth but he interrupts.

"You fucking scared the shit out of me! Out of Will, and Kristi....the twins are running up and down the trails to find you!" He said furiously.
"I thought you might have gone on the trail in the middle of the night and got hurt! What the fuck were you thinking?"

The nerve of this man. Asking me what I was thinking when he was the whole reason for me sleeping in the cold.
This arrogant bastard had so many things wrong in his head that it made my own head hurt.

"What was I thinking? I was thinking about how much I fucking hate you for being such an arrogant asshole!"

"What?" He is completely bemused.

"Do you do this to other girls? Is a regular thing for you? You find just some random girl during the summer, Fuck her, make her want you and love you, then toss her aside when she has to leave. You act like it meant something to you but really it was just you having fun...and if she comes back you decide to push her away so that she realizes what asshole you really are."

"Allison, I-."

"You what? Your sorry? You just wanted me to get the message that I was just some easy fuck?"
I stand up and go for my clothes that lay on the floor.

"Can you please listen to me!" He yells.

"No! I'm done listening! I'm sick and tired of people telling me how things really are! That I'm wrong, that I need to get over it...you're just like them, telling me what I need to do, how I need to be," I say as I pull on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt.

"No, Allison, that's not what I'm trying to do. I need you to know that I am not like the guy you think I am. I never wanted to hurt you! Fuck!" He slams his hand on the counter making me jump. I move to the ladder but he moves in front of me.

"Allison, elsker, baby, the past few weeks have been the best weeks of my life. I have never felt like this before, I've never wanted someone as much as I want you. Fuck! Allison, I need you. You have no idea how hard it was to watch you get on that boat."

"I was there! I cried the whole way home! I wanted to stay with you, run away with you. But, I'm glad I didn't, obviously I was just a way for you to waste time until she came along!"

"No! Angela means nothing, we aren't even together! It's nothing. I hate that woman, she's spiteful and evil, you know that."

"There are a lot of things I thought I knew, obviously I am beyond stupid for believing in so much of it."

He grabs my shoulders.

"Don't say that! Don't you dare fucking say that! You are the smartest, most beautiful, most amazing woman I have ever met in my entire life. Allison, I love you, I love you so fucking much that it is killing me," He says sinking to his knees.