Unraveling Rosen | ✓

30 | cou-de-pied

3 0

c o u - d e - p i e d

A unilateral standing posture with the pointed gesture foot held in front of, back of, or wrapped around the ankle of the stance leg.

I haven't seen Rosen in a few days now. It definitely feels more than a few days. Feels more like a few years. Rosen told me he wants to be alone for a while. That's totally understandable, considering he just lost his mother.

As for the Juilliard acceptance letters, Rosen didn't say much when he received his. Yeah, he said that Faith won't ever be here to see him succeed but that's how far his initial shock went. Afterwards he started saying random crap that I didn't really enjoy.

"There's no point in going to Juilliard now," Rosen mutters as we continue to sit on his couch and sip on our teas. "Sure, this is all I wanted in life but there's no point. I wanted to do this to provide a secure life for my mother. To make sure that I can take care of her financially and we won't have any struggles."

"Hey, don't think like that." I comfort him as I wrap my arm around his shoulder and pull him in for a hug, gently caressing his hair as he holds onto my body. "You've dreamed about this moment for your entire life and it's finally here. Don't let one tragedy ruin the rest of your life."

Rosen snorts, "One tragedy? My entire life is a tragedy. I don't have anyone left in my life anymore. It's just me and the thousands of dollars of debt that I'm now in since I tried to save my mother."

"I can help you financially if you want to," I offer. "It might not be much but maybe that's what you need in a situation like this. Let me help you get back on your feet."

Rosen shakes his head. "I don't want your money. I can do this on my own. At least I hope."

That's when Rosen pulls away from me, my body instantly colder from losing his touch. He furrows his eyebrows and slowly turns to me. His eyes flicker down, avoiding eye contact with me.

"I think it's best if you leave now," Rosen mumbles under his breath. "I need some time alone. I'll call you sometime."

For a second it feels like I've been stabbed in the neck or something like that. I keep my eyes on Rosen, whose facial expression has gone completely blank by now. There isn't a single emotion in his eyes, he's just staring at me, a complete void in his eyes.

I softly take his hand and place a small kiss on the back of it. Rosen flinches at my touch. That makes my heart hurt even more. He pulls his hand away from me and looks at me once again.

"You should go." He repeats.

"Rosen, please don't push me away." I feel my voice slightly cracking at the end of my sentence but that doesn't seem to affect Rosen.

"Just go." He whispers once again before standing up and heading towards his bedroom. "I need to be alone."

With a final sigh I do what Rosen asked me. I walk out of his apartment, leaving him alone just like he wanted. But deep down in my heart I can't help but feel complete pain and emptiness, like this moment was the last time I'm gonna see Rosen for a little while.

So that's when I last saw Rosen, when he told me to leave him alone for a while. I don't even know how long is a while. Does he mean a day? A week? A year? Sometimes I don't even understand what Rosen means with his words. He's honestly such a mystery it blows my mind.