Hotchniss

18 (Blue Pants)

"Hey Hotch," seeing him so humanized she calms. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah, yeah of course." He steps back and she looks down and smirks.

If only the team could see this half of Aaron Hotchner. The half that wears white t-shirts and blue, almost scrub like, pajama pants.

"I'm sorry, it didn't really register in my head what time it is." She find herself blushing and curses both Hotch and Morgan.

"Oh it's fine," he tosses his tooth brush to the kitchen sink. "I can't sleep so you're probably saving me a Melatonin and a therapy bill."

She smirks," a therapy bill?"

He smiles too, and shakes his head," well if Dave ever finds out I can't sleep at night. Yes. A therapy bill."

Hotch runs a hand down his freshly shaven face," he'd credit my insomnia to some traumatic event that happened when I was a rookie."

Emily slips her wet shoes and walks over to where he's leaning against the couch," how exactly did rookie year go?"

He shakes his head with a small grin," far to much to explain in just one night."

She nods and drags her foot in his carpet. She'd grown so comfortable in this apartment. She'd grown comfortable with Hotch. Maybe to close.

"Something on your mind?" She jumps and instantly feels a blush creep over her cheeks.

She contemplates lying to him but those deep brown eyes reflect a deep serenade of trust and comfort. "Yeah, actually."

She doesn't miss just how happy her looks when she admits she needs to talk. He can't help it. Someone wants his help. It's the one thing he can do. Help others.

"Okay. Do you want to talk about it?" He asks and she can feel her composure breaking.

She's swept over with emotions that she hadn't realized she'd been pushing down. "It would be nice."

He stays leaning against the couch but his skin itches for her touch. "Well I'm all ears," he smirks at his little joke.

"Yeah," she says sniffling and wiping her eyes. "All ears. How are your ears? God, I'd complete forgotten about that."

In the severity of the entire year after the SUV blowing up on him and Kate it's not that hard to over look such a simple injury.

"Well I'm not deaf, so fine." He taps his finger against the couch and sighs," so what's bothering you?"

She looks down and continues to drag her foot along the carpet," when we were kidnapped.." She glances up at him and back down,"...I just feel very guilty."

He sighs and moves closer to her, in front of her," I don't honestly remember alot from our... experience. However I do have a distinct memory of telling you not to blame yourself."

She nods, a small nod but it's there, and pulls her shoulders in. A universal sign of making ones self shrink. Making ones self disappear.

He moves a little closer and from her view of the floor she sees his feet," but..uh you never listened before. Why start now?"

She smiles," yeah."

He steps into her bubble and wraps two warm arms around her," it wasn't your fault. Even if it was I refuse to blame you, okay? So you can't blame yourself. You're fine. I'm fine. That's all that matters."

He's right. They are fine. A little broken around the outside and a little on the inside but neither is dying. Which is certainly a change for them.

"Thank you, Hotch." She breathes him in. He smells like warmth. Like fabric softener, after shave, and a hint of toothpaste.

"Aaron. Just call me, Aaron." She lets her head come down and rest against his sternum.

"Okay...Aaron." His name rolls of her tongue flawlessly and it gives him a sense of pride.

"No one calls you Aaron any more, ever stop to consider why? You're distant, Aaron! And cold. They call you Hotch. Hotch this. Hotch that.  They call one another by their first names, I've heard it! Yet you've made it impossible for me to love you. You've pushed me away for the last-"

"Oh God." She whispers and he's jerked away from a fight that he and Hailey had years ago and he's back here with her in his apartment. "It's late!"

They pull away from each other's hug and Emily slides her shoes on. "I really have to go! See you at work!" In her hurry she doesn't think twice about the kiss to the cheek that she gives him and she's out the door without a second glance.

"Well," he touches his cheek as he stumbles down the hall.

"Daddy?" Jack croaks when Hotch pushes his door open.

"Right here buddy," he pulls his son close and images of Emily flash before his eyes.

"Night daddy," Jack rolls into Hotch and grips his shirt tight.

"Good night, buddy."