Thorns. A Soukoku Au.

a Mackerel and a Slug.

(baaack to Chuuya's pov)

This is all just a dream right?

This is not real. Impossible. This is just an illusion! Of course shitty Dazai will pull a trick in me.

The water is just strawberry juice. The cut from his wrists are just fake!
The bottle of pills laying in the ground, they are vitamins! See! All of this is just a shitty prank!

"Hahahahaha Dazai, I fell into your prank again. Am i stupid enough? I think I do because you got me there" This is so unreal and so ironic. 

I am just talking to a corpse now? His body is still warm! It is.... It can not be.

My legs feel like jelly as I keep staring at the bath tub full of crimson stained water and an unconscious body.

If I keep talking about how stupid I am he will answer, right?

I removed my gloves and my ponytail so atleast I can see Dazai's favorable expression. He always like me that way! He always like the part where I fell into his pranks!

I feel my wrists slowly gaining pain. I hurriedly cut the coat I was wearing and, Thorns are there!

"This can't be happening!" I screamed "No! Dazai! Wake up you bandaged fuck!" it had no avail.

I went to the side of the tub and my hands are shaking so badly. I put my hands into Dazai's still warm body. I found his wrist and saw a very huge and long but slender cut. The blood already stopped flowing but, there's nothing more to it.

"Congratulations motherfucker!" I said as I felt my heart break into pieces. This is what he always wanted so now he got it! I should be happy but NO! WHY DID HE DO THIS! Why...

I could feel myself at the virtue of breaking down.

Nameless memories of the two of us together flashed within my eyes.

When we first met on the port mafia, we are still children at that time but still, he is already full of bandages.

Being said that I have to work with him.

Our favorite place to have a drink. The very small bar on the next alley. Dazai went there and I followed and since then, we started drinking there.

Dazai trying to make me reach my hat because I am too small to reach it like always.

Having a list of nicknames that we gave to each other that literally got out of our hands.

Dazai trying to make me jump off a bridge but then, he just pushed me.

Using my powers but Dazai accidentally touch my hand.

Having the nickname SOUKOKU. I almost died if he weren't there.

Dazai "accidentally" trying to kiss me. "Because I need to know how CPR will work!"

Dazai opening gis first bottle of champagne and ended up breaking 3 wine glasses.

Dazai trying to buy bandages for me and endded up buying me a pair of wine instead.

All those shitty pranks.

All those insults and jokes.

And........

The last time I saw him alive and talked to him.

He is going home that one cloudy afternoon. He said to me that:

"Chuuya, can you go to my house for an hour or so? I wanted to talk to you about something."

'No. Go shit yourself. I'm not falling for that.'

"But Chuuy-"

'A NO MEANS NO. GO HOME YO SICK BASTARD. GO HOME WITH YOUR BANDAGE TRASH ASS'

"Fine. But please visit like, tommorow?"

'HELL NO SHUT UP!'

And that is the last time I saw him alive. His eyes there still shine but with tears. It is incomparable to his blunt and lifeless eyes right now.

After that I went home but I've been bothered by what Dazai want. Now that I decided to go on his house, I really wished that I didn't acted that way to him.

By that time, I am expecting a cheerful Dazai but I am not expecting this.

I still am sitting next to Dazai's now cold body. I removed him from the water and now I am just staring at a corpse. I can't still get over the fact that he is gone. It is like, I'm the one who killed him.

As I seemingly stare around this bathroom, I noticed a small and folded peice of paper. I reached toward it and found a note inside:

To my dearest Chuuya:
You are the last person that I expect to find this letter. If you are not Chuuya then, give it to him.

Buddy, this afternoon, I wanted to tell you something that is bothering me for a while. I know that you know we are soulmates. You are aware of that, right? So time passes by and I am falling deeper for you every single minute. I always liked almost everything about you. I know that you are not perfect anyways. But that is what makes you yourself.

Everyone who have an ability always have something wrong with them inside, right? So is that because I fell in love with someone who can't even love me back? I cherished every moment we had together.

I know this is strange since we are both men and it is not obvious. I am really sorry for not telling you the truth. Live your life happy and don't forget me. I shall go since I am running out a space to write. Never think that this is your fault. I love you, my dearest Chuuya. See you soon in another life.

-Dazai

This is so unacceptable. He only wants thing for himself. Why is he so selfish.. "D..Daz..zai....DAZAI! P..PLEASE... DON'T G..GO..... " I sobbed and touched somthing on the paper.

On the back of the paper, there is a key taped to it. I tried it in the nearest cabinet while my hands are still shaking. It opened and I found a book.

"A mackerel and a slug"

Inside of it, is a diary like about everything we both like, want and everything about us. Memories se had and so much more. The last I could see there is...

Wish:
"- I always wanted to commit a double suicide with someone. Chuuya maybe if it is ok. I want to die in the arms of someone I love."

I will give Dazai a gift. He will have this gift. I will make his wish come true.

I picked up the knife in my belt and pointed it to my stomach.

"I love you too, Dazai"

And I stabbed myself willingly.