The ambience of the hospital room was grim and just plainly depressing. The heart monitor would constantly beep and all Hayat could do was match Adam's breathing to it, just to reassure herself he was still alive. It irritated her that she was doing a rubbish job of keeping him happy and hopeful. She was at conflict with herself every time he peered at her with those green orbs. She just felt responsible for the pain that was clearly evident on his face every time he stifled a smile or remembered something that seemed to trigger his sadness.
Hayat remained at his bedside for more than 5 hours, wracking her brain with remorse. She promised herself that she would do more. Most of all, she wanted to promise her patient, she would do everything to help him. She observed how his firm chest would rise and fall evenly with the ticking of the clock. Her eyes skimmed his face, she never really took a moment to take in all his features. She smiled at the way his messy hair would spike out at the sides and the natural flow it would take just above his forehead. His left cheek was still bruised with a deep purple from the accident, which only made Hayat wince. His bottom lip was red and at the side from where the shard of glass ripped it, was stitched up with perfection.
She wondered about his past and what had possessed him to make such a decision to take his own life. He looked like he had everything, a perfect face, a muscular body, wealth and fame, heck, the list was endless. Why had he any need to commit suicide? He was practically rolling in bliss. But Hayat knew more than anyone else how that lifestyle felt like. Because she too clambered her way out of it.
As Hayat's eyes were locked onto his face, his eyes flickered open. The ends of his mouth curved into a grin as he took in the beautiful blessing in front of him. He had no idea how her nose was shaped or how her lips looked when she smiled. He only noticed her alluring eyes and the way her eyebrows twisted in frustration whenever the machine wasn't responding. He noted how each tear moistened her thick eyelashes, when she thought no one would notice, but he did. He observed her every reaction to things, which only heightened his trust in her. He was testing the waters, and he found that she possessed a heart. Which many people didn't have.
His mind felt cloudy and he had no idea how long he was unconscious for. His eyebrows contorted in confusion as he glanced up at the clock. And he finally realised something.
She waited for him.
He looked at her again, this time questioningly. Why had she waited just for him? Why couldn't she have left him asleep like any nurse would? As always, under his piercing gaze she seemed to fidget with anything in her hand, and glance in any direction just not in his eyes.
'Why?' His question lingered in the air and broke the hefty silence.
'Why what?' She was puzzled.
'Why did you stay here? Don't you have anything better to do?' There was a hint of bitterness in that question that seemed to prick at her self-condemnation.
'I wanted to check if you were okay. You've been unconscious for a good five hours.'
'That doesn't answer the question.' His mind began to question her motives. He was looking for something else.
She sighed and got up to refill a cup of water to give to him. He was going through a lot and he just needed time, Hayat reassured herself.
'Please don't go.' His plead sounded desperate and she hooked her eyes onto his hand that caught the ends of her scarf. He gripped onto it firmly.
She was afraid. Afraid of those screams that haunted her as she slept and greeted her as she awoke. Any form of rejection or hesitance could easily break him.
She looked firmly into his eyes this time and at his hand. He was more than just hurt, he was going through trauma which she knew nothing about.
'It's okay Adam, I was just getting you some water. I'll stay.' Her hands pulled softly at the scarf as he nodded and let go reluctantly.
'Adam,' She thought about every single way to make him feel better, but she needed him to trust her. 'I want you to be able to trust me. You can talk to me about absolutely anything. I'll always be here to listen.'
His ears felt as if they were burning. He had definitely heard those words before and it bit at him with contempt. Hayat noticed the way his eyes began to water and his face contort in anger. Did she say something wrong?
The heart monitor seemed to gradually raise in beeps and he started to breath unevenly. She was scared about what was to come next. But she knew of one way she could try to stop it.
'Adam, I'm here. It's okay. Look at me.' Her soft voice had vibrated into his ears as she sat on his bed, her eyes pleading for him to calm down.
He wanted to be sure that he could trust her, and thinking about her leaving him wasn't something that he was ready for. She made him happy and he needed her to stay with him. But those words awoke something in him, that he never wanted to hear from her again. He gazed into her eyes, warm tears dripping down his cheeks in sequence. It was as if he was searching for something. Searching for loyalty and trust. He was trying so hard. The urge to feel warmth and love perturbed him and he couldn't control it. Adam wrapped his arms around Hayat, resting his head on her soft shoulder, his tears rolled onto the thick fabric of her dress.
Hug me back. Please.
His broken sobs were slowly increasing when he felt her freeze in her spot. She wasn't reciprocating the embrace which obviously meant that she hated him too, much like everyone else, he thought. But Hayat only hated the effect his screams had on her heart. They made her feel guilty as if she had caused every single ounce of pain that he experienced. She wanted to comfort him but how? With her unresponsive behaviour, she was sure his condition would worsen. Wouldn't it?
She slowly started to succumb to the feeling of his heavy embrace. Her mind was at such a weak place that no matter how much it persuaded her not to hug him back, her limbs seemed to work on their own. Her shaky hands reached up reluctantly to his weak back, in an effort to calm him down.
Her touch erupted goosebumps all over his body and his back seemed to stiffen under her delicate sweet hands. His breathing became regular and his screams slowed down to sorrowful quiet sobs as her hands rubbed his back with slow circular motions.
'Shh, it's okay. Everything will be okay. I promise.' Her voice was inches from his ear and he could feel the heat of her breathe on his lobe.
She seemed to soothe every inch of his body with her soft voice and delicate hands that he couldn't imagine calming down without her. His panic attacks lasted almost an hour, regularly, but with her comforting him the way she did, he recovered in minutes. His heart was in complete awe of her, that any word she said echoed through his mind with each passing day. The way her eyes glanced downwards whenever she felt shy or when their eyes locked together, sent his heart into a frenzy. She was his cure and Adam was sure of it.
It was in that moment when Adam felt it. He finally felt warmth and love. He felt as if someone really cared about him. Maybe, after all he did have a chance.
Except, one person's happiness may have just led to another's sadness. You see, only one heart seemed to find peace and tranquility that night. And the other, suffocated within an endless pit of guilt and regret.
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Last Sacrifice | #Wattys2018
Romance'I can't stop.' His voice was husky and his breath, ragged. He backed her up against the wall, the warmth of his breath penetrating her ears and his lips lightly brushing against the soft skin of her earlobe. She closed her eyes, sucking in her bo...
