Chapter 4

1.7K 67 34
                                    

Bucky lay on the couch slighty awake didnt move because he liked the way that steve had Wrapped his arms around him. He still noticed his hand was still holding onto Steve. His warm gentle hand was still entwined with his. Bucky lay their, he was hurting himself trying to remember him and his Best bud past. He couldnt though, their was a blockage everytime he tried. He tried and tried and tried but simply nothing.

Bucky would sometimes fear what the Russians put into his mind and he had the right be afraid.

His head Kept spinning and the worst time would come when his mind had a mind of its own. It told his body what to do and he'd do it. His eyes were wide open as he lay their helpless with the circulation of steves warm blood wrapped him. Steves Soft breathing in his ears.

"Your closer to your mission than ever before, your not a failure, all i need to do is get a knife and finish him off."  His mind echoed. His mind throbbing

Bucky tried to take his mind off the situation but he couldnt.He was made  to take orders, And he would take them and he would do it with hesitation, but lately that wasnt happening.

His mind took over and the voices filled his head:

To Finish Captain Rogers for the greater good.  Now Thats an Order.

Bucky got up out of his position wedged between Steve and the couch.He tried to move slowly slipping out a bit at a time,trying not to wake steve up. The hardest part was moving Steves arm that was so firmly clunch onto Buckys arm and around him.

"He really wont let go wont he." he whispered under his breath.

When Buckys hand finally broke free, steve moaned and turned on his side hugging his pilliow. He was relieved that he had got out without waking steve up.

Bucky had to admit how adorable Steve Looked sleeping. His soft lips pursed together,his tight body incased in a tight white singlet and those stripy boxer shorts of his. His Ruffed up Blonde hair in a beautiful mess,His Soft eyes closed with his long lashes closed ever so gently. He stood their watching The Captain sleep taking in the rise and the fall of his chest.

After moments of watching like a bloody Creep, he shoke his head and remembered why he got out of Steves warm embrace and walked up to the kitchen. He opens the draws really slowly and quietly searching for a suitable knife to kill someone with.

He found the perfect one, a sliver jaggered tip fruit knife.

He walked up to where Steve was sleeping. He Looked at him one last time.

"Do It!" His Mind Shouted

"Do It now!!"

Bucky Raised the Knife in the open air and Focused on the Captains Chest.

Bucky turned away from Steves Face, and forced it deep down. But Their were no cries or shrieks but the pain inside him.

He forced it into his own Chest.

He couldnt do it. He couldnt do it to A man who saved him, a man who didnt treat him as a robotic being but a normal human Being.

The Pain spread through his whole body like water in electricty.He Fell to the ground with a thud. His Chest spewing with blood. He struggled to keep his eyes open and his breathing pattern started to fail. His eyes started to close.

The Light Faded away and the darkness shaded over.

~

Bucky was rushed into hospital early that morning. Agent 13 Found him lying on the ground while checking if Steve was okay for he hadnt gone out on a morning paper run.

His Chest wound was not fatal but could of killed him. Steve Didnt understand why he tried to do it. His tears rushing down his eyes as they lay him on a strecter and carried him to a ambulance bed. The Avengers were their to comfort Steve and drive Steve to the hospital later that morning. They all had to have an explanation from Steve telling them who this man was that was trying to kill himself.

As the Days went by their was less and less life in Bucky. His body was purple and the bruises had turned into a darker purple. The Doctors and nurses did everything they could to save Bucky. The amount of machines and Oxygen tanks they used were un countable.

Steve pulled a chair next to Buckys Bedside where he stayes seated their for more than 3 days.

The Avengers offered him food and water but he refuses to leave.

"I'll DIE TO IF HE IS! I CAN'T LOSE HIM AGAIN!" he cried after bring harrassed with Food by Tony. The Playboy walked out annoyed and told everyone not to annoy the capsicle while his mourning over a friend.

Untill one day their was hope and Steves Prays were answered.

Bucky woke up confused and not sure what or where he was. He sat up slightly noting the Doctors and nurses outside his door rushing around with patients. He then noted Steve was Beside him. Their were some Flowers and A Teddy bear with a Metal arm and another Bear in Blue and red.

"I tried Stevie." Bucky Murmured looking at him trying to force a smile.

Steve looked up relived and happy.

"Bucky! You came back to me!" Steve said embracing for a hug. His eyes filling with tears of joy, his friend decided not to give up on him just yet.

"I'm so sorry." Bucky said back

"Lets try not to talk about it" Steve said wiping away his tears

"But why?"

Bucky Turned on his side facing the other way.

"Im a Fucken Mess Steve, I mean look at you a Fucken American Patriot, while i am a Soviet Russian Spy. I Cant even Piece together half of my life. I killed innocent Women and children and... and i needed to Fucken end the pain i was going through, Im a horrible person!" Bucky lashed out

"Bucky.... Listen to me you were brain washed, you didnt kill all those people it was the other guy... Your not killing yourself espically not when im around. Your Not a horrible person, espically to me, You saved me when my mother died, You were the one that gave me hope. So dont you dare call yourself a horrible person because your... your... a normal kid from Brooklyn Just like me and if no one thinks your special,that doesnt mattar because I Love you for who you are, even with your stupid arm and even if you dont love yourself.I'm with you till the end of the line"

Steve placed a warm hand on his shoulder, Bucky turned around and looked at Steves Blue eyes. Bucky Himself was getting teary. Steve really meant it.

"You really are something Steve. You really are fucken something." Bucky smiled holding his hand out.

"Jerk"

"Punk"

Hey Gals,
Hope you liked his chapter, sorry it was a bit short but i really didnt know what else to write after it so yea. Sorry for some spelling mistakes, i tried to fish them all out hopfully.Hope your liking it.
PLEASE COMMENT AND VOTE OR TELL ME WHAT YOU LIKE SO FAR!!♥♥♥
Thank you Guys so much x

Come Back to MeWhere stories live. Discover now