THE CAPTIVATED

Chapter 24

It was drizzling but, it was different today. The sky was dark grey with clouds overhead and it looked like they were crying with me in my sorrow, and my sorrow was a sadness that was crying for me. The pain I felt made my heart break into millions of pieces everytime his name rolled off my tongue. It was as if my tears painted the canvas into different shades of sorrow. Of losing him...

I sighed loudly, feeling helpless.

Four days...

It has been four days since he left without explanation, with hatred and rejection for me in his eyes. Four days without knowing where he was, or how he was. Four days of losing myself. I know, four days doesn't sound too long, but with him gone, these four days felt like four eternities to me. That's what he did to me. I missed him terribly.

Even my tears had dried up now. I didn't cry anymore since the day he left, after the nightmare. I tried cutting out the feeling, the attachments, but truly I was numb. Numb and empty, hollow. Damon took a piece of me with him when he left.

My heart.

I did not feel anything as the numbness engulfed me, stretching its unwelcomed arms wide open. Well, anything except loneliness, a feeling I hated so much. I was alone ever since my parents died, not letting anyone else to break down my walls but Damon did. And with him gone, the alone changed to loneliness.

Everything here was a reminder of him, of us. The halls, the rooms, and even the paintings and portraits. They reminded me of him and that's what hurt me the most. I had no idea when he'll return, if he ever did. He looked so indifferent back then. Just a few hours ago we were together, so much in love but no good thing lasts till the end.

Maybe, it really was my fault, I thought. If Xander wasn't there to haunt and ruin my life then we would have been together at this very moment. But then again, if Xander was not there to take me on the first place, I would have never met Damon.

My Damon.

It was my fault he left. I was the one to be blamed. And I was guilty, I wanted to pay.
Or maybe, I never deserved his love.

I sighed again and looked at the windows. A strong gust of wind was blowing outside, making the windows rattle. I tore my eyes away from the windows, the rain increased it pace, it was pouring now.

I went near the paintings he made, of the girl. He made them so good, something that was the perfect example perfection. But, who is she, was a question that was still to be answered. She did look like me upto some extent, with the same long wavy brown hair and the blue eyes, with love in them. But that wasn't me, I was sure. Damon and I never met before.

"Old love, could be...", I muttered. But, my chest tightened on that thought and I started wanting him more, needing him next to me. Four days didn't make me missing him any less, and if something, it only increased. My hope was dying down and an unnoticed tear escaped my eye when I thought back to the evening he asked me to be his by the river. Little did I knew, I was always his. My visions showed me him. Damon.

I smiled sadly, thinking of our first kiss. The passion, the need, the hunger. More importantly, the love. And, how good it felt to be in his arms, curled up next to him. Good memories.

My stomach grumbled. No, I wasn't hungry, my appetite was long gone but I had to eat to survive.

I walked up to the kitchen that was so perfectly set. The first night I came here, both of us were strangers but there was something in him that was calling out to me. He made me noodles that night. He was embarrassed that he couldn't give me something better but to me, they tasted so damn good. I smiled at the memory and decided to make pasta. It was the easiest I could do. I turned on the oven and put the water in a bowl, keeping it on the oven to let it boil.