Not The Same | Nick Clark | FTWD

Part 14

I sat on the ledge of the bathtub as I watched Nick tend to his face that had began to bruise. It hurt to see him so broken down, and I knew that if the world wasn't what it was right now, he would've already left a long time ago.

"This has to stop, Nick." I said tiredly as I shook my head, watching his reflection in the mirror.

He let out a mindless hum, either not paying attention to or not caring about the thing that I had said over and over again throughout our relationship.

"I'm serious, I-" I paused, letting out a sigh as I tried to organize what I wanted to say, "I love you, but I couldn't take it then and I sure as hell can't take it now." I admitted, "I-"

I was cut off as the door to the bathroom swung open, Alicia on the other side, "Go away." Nick's raspy voice pleaded as he stopped the door.

"What the hell happened to your face?" She asked, fighting to keep the door open.

"Knock for Christ sake-- go away!" Nick fought as I felt nauseous from the déjà vu moments that were flooding back to me.

"Nick, stop!" Alicia pleaded as she pushed back on the wooden door, "Let me just have a look at it!"

Nick turned back to me after he slammed the door, Alicia still protesting on the other side.

"Just let her in.." I breathed as I watched him roughly rub his hands over his face, his mind more stressed and overworked than mine.

"Nick." Travis's distinct voice was heard on the other side after Alicia's, following a loud knock.

Silence fell before Alicia's voice could be heard again, "Nick, he's gone." She said lowly, "Come on, let me in."

"We can't do this forever." I said, just above a whisper as our eyes briefly locked, "Neither of us can."

Alicia sighed from the other side of the door, "Do you want me to get mom?"

I watched as Nick let out a tired, defeated sign, no longer willing to fight what he couldn't beat as he stepped away from the door-- the air between us now thick.

I stood up, uncomfortably pulling loose strands of hair behind my ear as I went for the door, pushing past Alicia as we essentially traded places.

I just needed air-- just a second to regroup myself and figure out how to continue. As much as I love Nick, I let him unintentionally put me through hell; I'm drug through nearly every high and withdrawal, minus the pleasure the poison brings.
I can't even count the amount of times I hid him from his family-- from police and therapists, just because he wanted somewhere safe to be but couldn't take another lecture. I remember staying up all night with my hand on his chest, afraid that the rhythm would falter and I'd have no one to blame but myself.
But even with everything we've been through, I knew I'd still do whatever I could to keep him safe.. because I knew he'd do the same for me.

***

I leaned my head back against the hallway wall, not knowing what to say or do as military personnel began pulling Griselda out of the bedroom on a stretcher, Daniel following close behind before Nick and Alicia slowly peaked out of the bathroom door.

"What the hell's going on?" Nick mumbled as he stepped out.

I shrugged, "I think they're taking Daniel and his wife back to that treatment facility."