Not The Same | Nick Clark | FTWD

Part 24

As daylight broke and our nerves began to calm, it was clear to see that we were all just trying to finally catch our breath. Ever since this whole thing started it felt like we hit the ground running, even back at Strand's place we only had a few hours of peace before all hell broke loose again.

I was never much of a fan of the ocean, although watching the sun glisten off its wakes was beautiful, it just carried too many dangerous possibilities that caused me to never really allow myself to fully enjoy it's soothing nature.

"I wonder if Strand has a deck of cards on board." I questioned, sitting beside Nick as both of our feet dangled in the water below us.

"Why? So I can embarrass you again?" He teased, leaning back as he looked out over the water.

I scoffed, "Ok, let's not pretend like you don't cheat-"

"How do I cheat?" He cut me off, "When is one time anyone has ever caught me cheating?"

I went to open my mouth before I realized I had no real answer, a smirk growing on Nick's face, "I don't need proof of you cheating to know that it's the only possible explanation for you always winning."

Nick shrugged, "Oh, I'm just that good, baby."

I laughed, shaking my head before glancing up to the upper deck, "Alicia!" I called, wanting to get a third opinion on this matter.

Seconds later Alicia appeared, peering down over the railing, "What's up?"

"Does Nick cheat during cards?"

"Yeah-- one hundred percent." She nodded simply causing Nick to quickly look back in her direction.

"What the hell?" He asked up to her, "You're my sister-- you're supposed to be on my side!"

She shrugged, walking off, "Cheaters never prosper, Nick!"

"Knew it." I said under my breath, loud enough for him to hear as I fought the smirk that was pulling at the corners of my mouth.

Nick shook his head, "You shouldn't believe a word she says, I saw her cheat during Bingo when we were younger."

I furrowed my eyebrows, looking over to him as a laugh escaped my lips causing a smile to break on his face, "How the hell do you cheat at Bingo-" I questioned before getting cut off, the sound of dozens of pleading voices filling the air.

We quickly stood up, Daniel coming up behind us as we all scanned the waters edge, soon seeing a life raft overflowing with desperate people.

I felt speechless at the sight-- another reminder of what the world was currently filled with, even though the haunting images never left my mind to begin with.

"Madison?" I called as I looked to the upper deck, seeing Madison and Alicia staring at the same thing we were.

She nodded, "I'm going to go talk to Strand!"

I turned back, seeing the raft slowly pass further and further by us as my heart pounded against my chest, feeling like it could knock the wind straight out of me.

"We got company." Daniel said up to Travis as he appeared on the upper deck.

I let out a quiet breath, time ticking by with each wake that collapse against the boats edge before I impatiently turned to climb up the stairs, hoping there was some way that I could help.

"Hannah, don't--" Nick stopped me, grabbing my arm as he pulled me back, "You don't need to get involved in this."

"Then what do we do?" I breathed as the pleads of the strangers never seemed to falter; the Abigail passing by them like they didn't exist.

"We do nothing." Daniel answered, the boats propellers beginning to roar underneath us.

"Mom, what's going on?" Nick asked, turning as Madison returned, coming down onto the launch.

"Ask your new friend." She said lowly.

***

"Would you have stopped?" I asked, looking over to Ofelia as we both sat on the couch, away from everyone else.

"They were strangers," she shrugged, "When people are scared and desperate, they'll do whatever it takes to survive."

"We were strangers though-- all of us were at one point." I reminded.

"So are you saying that if you were in Strands place, you would've stopped?"

I bit at my cheek for a moment, trying to find an answer that I truly believed, "I don't know." I said honestly, leaning my head in my hand as I stared off blankly, "I want to say that I would've.. but a part of me is glad that we didn't."

"I don't think there's anything wrong with that," Ofelia admitted, getting my attention again as she patted my leg, "At least your heart's in the right place."

I really did believe my heart was in the right place like she said, but it's been in that place for so long.. I don't know how much longer it can last.
Dating an addict, or being close to an addict in general, takes a lot out of you and most of the time you don't get back what you put in, and that can be really damaging in the long run.
I'd never blame anything on Nick because if he knew how much loving him really took out of me, he'd never let me see him again. But at the end of the day, I know that a time will come when I won't be able to take it anymore.. and I'm more terrified about it than I'd like to admit.

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I can't explain to you how much I'm truly enjoying writing this book, so I hope you're enjoying it as well!

Also, as time goes on, you'll get even more in depth looks at Hannah and Nick's relationship, which has been super interested to write tbh