Campus Love (sequel) Malexmale

19

I found out that Matt Bomer, who I cast as David's character, went to the same high school district as I did. He went to Klein High and that's where I took my SAT! Lol!

~Casper~

I placed my hands in David's as he led me to our bed so we could sit down. I put my feet up on the bed and snuggled into his arms, needing the warmth. "What makes you feel ashamed when it comes to Alex?" I quietly asked.

"I let him go," he confessed. There was a sorrow laced in his voice that made me hold him tight in an attempt to assure him that he was okay. "I feel like I abandoned him."

"His mother decided to keep him. That wasn't your fault, David."

"After Rowan's accident, I had the chance to adopt him still. I refused. After that, she didn't want to put him up for adoption and kept him. For years I just regretted it because... he's innocent and doesn't deserve to be passed around like a toy. Yes, a baby is a huge responsibility but it shouldn't be a burden to love and care for one. I feel like she considered him as a weight on her shoulder that she couldn't shake off. So I'm guilty."

"You have the chance to adopt him again. Take it; he's your son-"

"But he's not, Casper. And I'm so ashamed."

"I think... you were in a very depressed and unstable state of mind at the time. You didn't believe you were in the proper mindset to raise a child after suffering a loss-"

"A loss that wasn't real." He shook his head. "Now you know why I don't mention him. And I'm done talking about the whole thing; I can't do it."

"Okay. I just thought giving you some space and time to think would help."

"That's not true, is it?"

I pulled away to look into his eyes. "Why wouldn't it be true?"

"You weren't giving me space. You were giving yourself space."

I shook my head and thought about what he was trying to say. "No, I..." My voice trailed off. Was he right? Because I'd been convinced that my decision to give him distance for a week or so was for his sake. I mean, little Alex was out there and I just couldn't be in the picture if he was planning to adopt him with Rowan.

"Casper, you're overwhelmed. You can admit it; I'll understand." He caressed my cheek. "I didn't want this for you."

"I'm sorry," I whispered once I realized just how right he was. I guess I kept telling myself that I was doing it for him until I started to believe it, but of course, he was more perceptive than I was.

"No, don't be angel. It's okay." David leaned over and kissed my forehead.

"I wanna be a great and supportive boyfriend, honest."

"And you are, in every aspect. It's no crime to want space when you're overwhelmed and if that's what you need, just talk to me. I'll never be mad at you for it."

I placed my hand in his lap and he held it, pulling me closer. "So, do you need time away?"

"I-I don't want time away from you," I quietly admitted. "But 'want' isn't the same as 'need.'"

"Listen. You can spend a few days with your friends. Go out, have a little fun, breathe fresh air, and when you're ready you can come back. I'll be here when you do." He stroked my hair and I hesitantly nodded, hugging his body.

~Dani~

Rowan stared at me in nothing but utter surprise. I let go of his hand as his expressions ranged from disbelief to shock then confusion.