Portal: Love as a Construct

Part 24. The Realisation

Part 24. The Realisation

I still can't quite believe it. I'm alive, and Wheatley has saved my life.

It is three days later and he hasn't left my chamber, not even once. I almost don't want him to. I have the bizarre impression that if he does, this reality will disappear and I'll return to that other one. Where I do and yet I don't exist both at the same time inside of the black box. Three days later and his words are still echoing in my brain. Those last two minutes of my life, preserved for analysis.

I love you because you're you, Gladys.

I am no longer trapped in an existence two minutes wide and yet I find myself revisiting it over and over again. From the fear and panic that set in when I realised what he'd said to the final second where I felt so much it almost all blended together into something I couldn't feel at all. As far as the last two minutes of one's life go, that was... an experience I never would have predicted. And while I do understand it now, I am still coming to terms with what it all means. I'm a lot of things, but... none of what he said has ever crossed my mind. He'll leave the room eventually, but he won't be leaving. That's a fact. So I don't need to be concerned about it at all. What I actually need to concern myself with is Caroline.

She hasn't been this quiet since the time I didn't know about her. She has literally said nothing for the last three days, and if not for her undeniable presence I would have thought she had stayed dead. I've left her alone thus far - I have no idea how the black box affects her, if indeed it does - but I'm discovering that a silent Caroline is somehow worse than a Caroline that won't shut up.

Caroline. Are you all right? Oh. That was easier to say than I expected.

Hm?

You've been very quiet as of late.

I'm just... I'm just thinking, that's all. Don't worry about it.

She does sound very distracted, but I have never yet met a human who was able to focus on one thing for more than ten minutes. You seem to be going at it rather hard.

I said don't worry about it.

And with that, that line of inquiry is closed. I'm learning that it is rather hard to engage someone who won't engage back. Time to try something else.

Well, I admit it.

Admit what?

Aha. That got her interested. A hint at vulnerability will usually do the trick, I've found.

That I have a crush on him.

Told you so, Caroline says smugly. I knew it.

I'm still not attracted to him, though.

Caroline snorts. Sure you're not. Until three years from now, when you finally admit it.

Caroline, he's a metal eyeball. Please tell me what about that is attractive.

It's more than appearance, you silly robot, Caroline objects. It depends on personality and stuff like that too.

I look over at him. He's reading something, I don't know what and haven't bothered to ask. He has improved rather a lot, but every once in a while he frowns and mumbles a word to himself in order to sound it out. That is actually endearing, somehow. And I do enjoy his alternate pronunciations of certain words. Whenever he says 'zehbra' I can't help but laugh. One day I must get him into a conversation about metals just so I can hear him say 'aluminium.'