So What If It's Us?

Forgiveness, Can You Imagine?

TW: None

⚠️Warning ⚠️ 

There's gonna be a shitload of angst

Have fun

Connor's POV

I walked up onto the frosty lawn by myself. I could feel Jeremy and Michael's eyes following me as I made my way up to the apartment door. This better work, I thought. I took a deep breath before knocking on the door. I heard shuffling before it opened a crack.

"What the fuck do you want?" A voice growled.

"I want to talk to Evan." I told them. The voice was about to say something before they were cut off. I heard whispering before someone grumbled,

"Alright." The door opened wider. I saw Jared, Leo, and a blonde haired woman that must've been Evan's mom. They let me in and led me to Evan's room.

"Yell for us if you need anything." Leo told us. The trio gave me a glare as they shut the door behind me. I looked over at Evan's bed and saw a shaking lump underneath blankets.

"Ev." I whispered as I sat on the edge of the bed. My heart hurt to see him there, a sniffling crying mess. I tried to hug him, but he flinched away.

"Ev, I never meant to leave you there." I told him. He shook his head.

"B-But you d-did. Y-You left me t-to g-get high and drunk. I-I had a p-panic attack. D-Do you know h-how m-much that night b-broke my heart?" He asked me.

"Babe, I.." he cut me off.

"D-Don't 'babe' m-me. I-I felt s-so alone." Evan told me. Tears were now running down his face, his lips trembling.

"Hansen, I never meant to leave you. I swear I was going to get drinks. I got sidetracked and I fucked up. I know that. All I'm asking for you to do is consider giving me a second chance." I pleaded. He picked at a stray thread on his blanket. Then I noticed Evan was purposely avoiding my eyes. I gently grabbed his chin and made him look me in the eyes.

"Hansen, I can't live without you. You saved me. When I was falling, you found me. I know I let you down. I let you fall. There's nothing I can do to change that. The least I can do is ask you to give me another shot. To let me back into your heart and find you." I whispered. I felt tears drip down my face as I waited for Evan to answer me.

He reached across the space between us and hugged me. I wrapped my arms around his waist and held onto him for dear life. Just then, my phone started buzzing.

Evan's POV

I felt Connor's phone buzz, ruining our moment. We pulled away. Connor took out his phone and frowned at the number.

"Random number." He muttered as he ended the call. I tackled him in a hug again, this time it went uninterrupted. When we pulled away this time, our lips were only inches apart. Connor smirked at me before pressing his lips against mine. I melted into the kiss. In the week Connor and I hadn't talked, I was a mess. I had missed him. Quick note. I suck at dates and times and stuff, so let's say they had been dating for a week and a few days.

" I love you Ev." He told me.

"I love you too." I whispered back. He pushed me back onto my pillows and snuggled into my side. I blushed at his sudden actions before I wrapped my arm around him and pulled him closer. I ran my hands through his hair for a few minutes maybe, when I noticed he had fallen asleep. 

I silently chuckled at him. Suddenly, his phone buzzed again. I sat there in the silence, Connor's snores and his phone's buzzing interrupting it every now and then. It became too much and I picked up his phone that had been tossed to the side. I didn't read the messages on the lock screen as I enetered his passcode. 420. I immediately felt bad, like I was invading his privacy. His phone buzzed again. Curiosity taking over, I decided to read the messages. I felt my heart shatter as I read each text.

Unknown: Hey cutie

Unknown: You need more weed yet

Unknown: haven't seen you in a while

Unknown: I miss you

Unknown: You wanna get together soon? My place? I had fun last time ;)

Unknown: You're probably with the Evan kid again

Unknown: He's not worth it y'know 

Unknown: Dump that bitch

Unknown: you know where I'll be when you end it. Then you can have some real fun

I bit back the sob that tried to escape my throat. I must've winced because Connor jumped awake.

"What's wrong? Why are you crying?" He asked as he brushed away my tears. I waved his phone at him. With a confused face, he took it and read through the messages. I could see Connor pale as he kept reading.

"Ev, no! She's just a crazy bitch. Don't listen to her." He told me as he tried to touch my shoulder. Like earlier, I jumped away from his touch.

"G-Get out." I whispered. He didn't move.

"Get out, Connor!" I screamed at him as I started to cry harder. I could see the pain in his eyes as he got up.

"Ev, you know you don't mean it." He said. I only shook my head. The door opened to reveal a scowling Jared. He marched up to Connor and grabbed his arm.

"Don't touch me Kleinman! Ev, I can explain!" He shouted as Jared dragged him away. The door slammed shut and I was left alone in my room. I could barely breathe as I cried harder. My vision blurred and I started shaking. I heard the door open. Someone rushed over and hugged me. I stiffened at the sudden contact.

I soon relaxed into the touch as I realized it was my mom. I could see a blur of long blonde hair and smelt strawberries. Definitely her. I wrapped my arms around her and sobbed into her shoulder. She stroked my hair and whispered sweet comforting words to me until I calmed down. 

When I finished crying and could see again she tucked me back into bed.

"I love you Evan. We're all here for you." She told me before she walked out the door. Within a few minutes I drifted off to sleep. I had no dreams or nightmares. All I saw was a black void. To be honest, that's how I felt right now. 

I had trusted Connor and I'd had fun. I might've even fallen in love. But he betrayed my trust. He left me alone to get high and drunk at a party. He knew I was anxious but yet he left me. And he was most likely cheating on me with someone the whole time.

No, I wasn't the black void. I was anger, anxiety, and depression all mixed together. And in a way, that was worse.

Connor's POV

Fuck.

Shit.

Fucking shit.

Fuckity fuck.

FUCK

Hey there. I hope you liked the chapter. I will actually be ending this fic soon. Don't panic! I will be writing a sequel. I already have an ending in mind and it will be the perfect cliffhanger. Probably like a few more chapters in this. I could change my mind though so this is just a possibility. Anyway, I need you guys to give me prompts for my oneshot book! I have no ideas at all! I already write angst here and have to brainstorm so I just want you guys to decide what you want to read. I will write it! Please! One more thing. Would you guys wants me to do a Q and A with the characters? I've seen other people do it and it looked really cool. Tell me what you think. I love all of you guys, remember that. I'm getting so close to 1,000 reads! Holy shit! Thanks again guys!

-Cronch