Call Girl

Part Seven : "but at the same time I love you"

Cinnamon:

The thick silence in Lance's room gave me chills, neither of us had spoken when Dominic left the house with a broken nose.

Lance sighed deeply.
"Cinnamon, I did what I had to do"

I couldn't begin to fathom what had possessed Lance to make him behave so callously, even though I knew Dominic was an ineffectual being. "You were so violent I've never seen you like that, what even happened"  I grabbed my head with my hands "Lance he's a f*****g crime investigator he'll arrest you and make sure you're locked up what is wrong with you"

He let out another deep sigh "he came over and demanded that I would let you go, but I told him no and then he said such horrible things about you" he shook his head slowly "he started calling you a whore" his voice became quieter "he called you a..." I could sense his great difficulty in finishing his next sentence "a prostitute" his voice became so muffled. But I heard exactly what he said. I felt sick and ashamed to the core. "all these lies he said, he called you a murderer, Cinnamon it drove me mad and I shouldn't have done what I did but he deserved it, who is he to lie and disrespect you like that".

"He didn't lie" i sobbed tremendously "I SELL MY BODY IN EXCHANGE FOR MONEY, IT'S WHAT I DO... it's how I survive" I started shouted as anger took over my entire body "I have no diploma, no chance of getting a real job because of you Lance" I pushed him making his fall on top of his sofa "you convinced me to leave school because you would look after me... and you kicked me to the curb. So don't judge me for something I was practically forced into doing"

I felt a huge boulder on my shoulders collapse as I finally revealed the truth to Lance. He stood looking at me in complete shock.

"Just text me tomorrow or whatever Lance. Ive loved you since we were 16, I've always loved you and that's all I can say to you right now"

Lance stood still, looking lifeless "you killed those men didn't you... it's all true what Dominic said" he started to tremble uncontrollably "Cinnamon why would you do this" he pulled the stray strands of blonde hair that rested on his head in confusion, seeing him like this reminded me of the time he kicked me out. "Everything Dominic said was true and I didn't believe him" he charged up closer to me and I slowly backed away "it's my fault that you're a p-p-p" he struggled to let that dirty word leave his mouth "it's my fault you have that job but it's not my fault you are a murderer, get out my house!"

"I didn't murder those men I promise you Lance, I'm still the girl that I used to be nothing has changed with me" I reached for a hug but he stood frozen. And so I saw myself out of his pretty little house.

As I was walking down the street in the dark, I turned and waited at the traffic lights. I pressed the rusty cold button and waited for the cars to stop. The fluorescent lights of every car shone on me but nothing could light up my dim soul. Far ahead, I noticed a large lorry speeding down. I could just throw myself in front of that lorry and this nightmare could be over, I thought. I felt a warm tear trickle down my face all the way down to the corner of my mouth. I don't want to live anymore, I thought, my life isn't worth living. I waited for the lorry to come closer and as it did I stepped out into the road and waited in the middle. But then the lorry lorry started to slow down. I looked up and saw the traffic light was shining a bright red. I can't even kill myself properly.

****
"Hey Dominic" I said as I let Dominic into my house.

A whole day had passed since Lance found out the truth about me and I had spent that entire day cooped up inside isolated. I had contemplated the idea of suicide but everytime I went to down a bottle of bleach I just couldn't do it. My hands refused to let the bleach anywhere near my mouth, it was as if they knew everything was going to be okay. And so I decided that I would possess a slightly more optimistic view. The trial was right across the corner and I couldn't help but feel so paranoid about it. So I decided to enlist the help of Dominic, as toxic and manipulative and confusing as he was, he seemed like the best option to help me put my mind at ease.

"I was surprised to see your text this morning I thought I'd be the last person you wanted to talk to"

"I hate you. You told Lance about my job, you had no right and now he thinks I murdered those men" I had to stop myself from going on a tangent, I needed Dominic and I couldn't afford to drive him away even though he treated me so awfully, "I do hate you, But at the same time I love you" I grasped my hand over my mouth as those three words and eight letters flew out of me uncontrollably. I was drunk on Dominic's prevalent lust which he always seemed to posses. "I'm stressed about the court case, Lance hates me and I need someone to talk to please, I never imagined that I'd come to you for help but I need you" I pleaded so pathetically.

Dominic slowly nodded his head and made his way into my living room.

I admired his extreme perfection as I sat opposite him. His frame was so firm, I could see his muscles filling up his cute blue button up shirt. Dominic was telling me that he wasn't going to press charges against Lance, and I could hear him apologizing for exposing me to Lance but all I could concentrate on was his steaming hot breath brushing against my neck, almost teasing me.

"Are you okay? You look a bit red and flustered" Dominic said, as he places the back oh his hand on my forehead.

"Yes, yes I'm fine" I pulled his hand away "I'm glad you're not pressing charges against Lance, he's a good guy who does stupid things" I saw Dominic abruptly roll his eyes at my statement. "But I didn't call you here to talk about Lance, and I don't care what you said to Lance, it's better if I don't associate with him anyway, Dominic I'm so scared about this trial" my bottom lip started to quiver "I didn't kill Peter or Simon, do you believe me"

Simon edged himself away from towards the end of the sofa. I knew what his answer was going to be. He thought I was a murderer, and that thought pained me deeply.

"I want to believe you, and some part of me does but I can't ignore the evidence that points towards you. It doesn't look good for you Cinnamon i'm not going to lie"

Tears tickled down my face like a broken faucet. I was all alone, I had no family and no friends to help me through this. It was inevitable that I was going to prison for something I didn't do. A great sense of nebula filled my mind. I kept weeping, what an awful sound it was, but Dominic solemnly watched me.

I wiped my tears and sat up "I understand, but it means a lot to me that you're here, I have nobody, Olivia and Lance never return my calls, so thank you so much Dominic"

I started to cry again, but Dominic wiped them away with his delicate fingers and started to caress my cheek. "I'll do whatever I can to make sure the real culprit gets punished for this, but if you did do this Cinnamon, you deserve to rot in prison" he said coldly which sent an intense chill through my veins.

"I promise it wasn't..." I desperately wanted him to believe me but he didn't let me finish.

"Shhhhh" he said, as if I was a child, and then he lent in toward me and platonically kissed my forehead; almost as if he had stamped my head with reassurance and faith.