101 Ways to ditch the Date | SIRIUS BLACK

No. 9

" - and that is the plan," Sirius said, him and James doing dramatic hand gestures which was met by the unimpressed looks of Peter and Remus, "So, what do you think, is it great or is it great?"

"Trick question," James said, "It's great."

"That doesn't even make sense," Remus replied, folding his arms.

"Yes it does," James said defensively, "Anyway, we asked about the plan, not about whether my use of trick question was right or not, did I now? Quit going off topic, Moony."

"I don't think you'll like my thoughts on the topic either," Remus replied dryly, taking a deep breath before raising his voice, "Are you completely mental?"

James and Sirius exchanged nervous glances, it was rare for Remus to raise his voice above a soft whisper: this was bad. James quickly said, "On second thoughts.... maybe we could go back to the trick question thing..." but trailed off as he realised it was far too long.

"No, we're not," Sirius said, straightening up slightly, "And I think it's a great plan."

"No, it's not, it's really not. Why are you trying to seduce Emmeline Vance? She clearly hates you, she can barely look at you - "

"All good relationships start with hate," Sirius said, "I mean just look at James and Lily."

"That doesn't count, he liked her from the start, you don't even like Emmeline, this plan makes no sense. She's not going to fall for you, Ora has more chance with her than you," Remus said.

"I don't doubt that," Peter cut in, "I feel like she can get anything she wants."

"... thanks, Wormy," Remus said, giving him an odd look, "Even if somehow it does work, which it WON'T, what are you planning to do? You'll get bored of within seconds, won't you and pretty soon you'd break up with her and it would make the whole plan completely useless. This is a stupid plan and it was never going to work."

"Well... that's your opinion," Sirius said huffily, folding his arms and turning slightly away from Remus, "You were all for the plan to steal the contract, what's with the change?"

"There is no change, it's just that plan was thought out, this is just you being Sirius. It's a Potter-Black plan and those never work," Remus said and both Sirius and James gave him irritated looks.

"I mean... some of them worked," Peter said, standing in between the three of them in a desperate attempt to mediate the situation, "Not all of them but you managed to prank Flitwick that one time and you did that fireworks prank on New Years - "

"See, Peter, thinks this plan will work," Sirius said.

"I don't actually," Pete said softly.

"TRAITOR!" James exclaimed, jabbing an excusing finger at Peter who hid back slightly.

"No, no, I'm not because that implies that I said it would work and then changed my mind, this is just me - "

"Being spineless?" Sirius cut in, folding his arms.

"Padfoot..." Remus said in a warning voice.

"I was going to say expressing my opinion," Peter replied dryly, "I think... I think you should try and get the contract fairly, maybe or write up your own. This plan with Emmeline is going to end in tears, for you and Ora."

"Well, I think you're both wrong," Sirius said, pouting moodily, "And ... woah, why will it end in tears for me?"

Peter shrugged but Sirius stood up, walking towards him slightly, "I didn't mean anything by it."