Y/N had spent most of her childhood years in Derry. Despite all the murders,the bullies,the depression that always ran through her because of it,she loved her birthplace. The bond between Derry and Y/N was strong,the girl loved the small town unconditionally,almost blindly. Derry was her weakness. Her priority. Her number one.
Adoring Derry also meant loving the people living in it. Specifically, a bunch of kids,a bunch of losers who Y/N swore she would never forget;Stan,Eddie,Ben,Bev,Richie,Mike and Bill...
Bill. Bill Denbrough. Her best friend. Her crush. The love of her life,maybe. Bill was just too perfect. With his beautiful eyes,his adorable stuttering...To her,he was the perfect boy. He was always kind and sweet to her... But then she would remind herself that she was just a young girl. Having feelings towards a boy was stupid. That's what her mother said.
Knowing that she had to leave everybody behind hurt too much. She got so attached to her friends,that when the time came and she had to announce the breaking news,she just couldn't help but sob and cry uncontrollably. Eddie had put his aspirator in her mouth,hoping it would help her calm down,but it was no use.
"Please don't cry..." Beverly had told her as she hugged her tightly.
"You don't understand..." Y/N said,wiping away a few tears using the sleeves of her long jacket. "I'm gonna live with my mom's sister. That bloody woman is gonna make my life a living hell..."
Nobody said anything except for Beverly who just whispered a weak "i know". And it was true. Because she knew how home could easily turn into inferno. But she didn't wanna tell.
"I'm gonna miss you guys. You have no idea how much..." She said and sniffed.
"We're gonna muh-muh-miss you t-too Y/N. " Said Bill and the girl felt her heart breaking into millions of pieces. The hardest part of the whole thing was leaving Bill. He was the first person she met from the losers' club and knowing that she would probably never see him again was killing her. Knowing that she would see none of her friends again was killing her.
The honk of her mother's car brought her back to reality. She was about to go,right. She was just saying her last goodbyes to her friends. She turned back and raised her left hand,motioning that she needed five more minutes. Her mom waved back at her and gave her a thumbs up.
"So...That's it,i guess..." Y/N shrugged and put her hands on her hips.
Hesitantly,Stan was the first who hugged her after Bev. Y/N gave him a sad smile as she wrapped her arms around him,a few more tears escaping her eyes.
"You can be such a diva sometimes but i'm gonna miss you like hell, Stanley..."
Then it was Richie,who tried to imitate Y/N's voice but failed,causing everyone to burst out laughing.
"Don't miss me too much trashmouth..."
Then, she warmly embraced Ben,"you're gonna be a freakin' model one day." and Mike, saying "When i come back,you better be the town's sheriff or else i'm gonna beat you up..."
She knew it was the last time looking at their faces. Nobody told her that,of course. If anything,her mother had promised her that she would return,eventually.
"When things get safe in Derry,i'm coming to get you."
But Y/N was a pessimist. All she could see was a life full of misery in a house without windows,accompanied by someone who wouldn't give a damn if she died. She knew herself more than anyone. And to her,it was just a fact that her life outside Derry wouldn't last for long. Believe it or not,she had accepted it.
She also knew she wouldn't be there to watch her friends defeat the beast. Yes,she was sure they would win the war. IT wasn't gonna get away with all those murders this time. And even though the losers' club wouldn't be the same without her,that's what Bill said,she highly doubted that the bond between them would break.
She got so lost in her thoughts,that she didn't feel two arms being wrapped around her small form. It wasn't until the person who owned them spoke into her ear,that she came back to her senses.
"Don't go,puh-puh-please..." His voice was low and sounded desperate.
Y/N felt her chest tighten. She wanted to let it all out,the sobs,the screams,the thoughts that haunted her mind. But she couldn't. She decided to try and stay as composed as possible. She didn't want her friends to realize she was crying for them. She had always been the strong one,yet this past few minutes showed otherwise. But that's how she wanted them to remember her,unbreakable till the end.
But when her body touched Bill's,when he burried his warm face in her neck,she couldn't help but cry. She tried to hold it in but failed miserably.
"You're gonna be everything you want to be one day,i promise." She said,her voice cracking.
"Y/N,we're gonna be late!" Her mother's voice slightly startled her and she immediately pulled away. So did Bill. The sadness on his face couldn't be hid.
Y/N gave everyone a sad smile,as she started taking a few steps backwards.
"Always a loser?" shouted Richie and she nodded.
"Always a loser." She repeated. Throwing one last glance at them,she turned around and started walking away. She put her right hand in her pocket,kicking some pebbles with her foot
"Billy,are you coming?" She heard Eddie ask.
"No,i'll catch up with you guys
l-l-ater." He replied.
Y/N blinked.
She stopped dead in her tracks,feeling like she couldn't breathe.
Was he...Was Bill...
A hand softly took her wrist and slowly spun her around,almost as if the person was afraid to see her crying face.
Y/N frowned,her heart sinking. Why couldn't he just let go? Why was he making things harder than they already were?
"I f-forgot to g-g-give you something." He whispered,never letting go of her trembling hand.
"I don't want you to give me anything,Billy. I won't forget you." She said,avoiding his gaze.
"N-n-no,i've b-b-been truh-trying to g-give you this s-since the day we m-m-met..."
Y/N looked up at him,confused.
"Your stuttering is getting worse,are you-"
She didn't manage to finish her question because his soft lips were on hers. It was quick and rather she short but to Y/N,it meant the world. Not even in her dreams,had Bill Denbrough kissed her.
Even though the kiss was salty,due to her tears,her heart was beating so fast and her cheeks had flushed. Bill had her wrapped around his little fucking finger.
"Best friends don't do that..." She mumbled when the boy pulled away.
"I guess they don't." he said,smiling.
"Jaysus Christ,Y/N! Come here,now!" Her mother seemed furious. She didn't really care about what her daughter said or did. All she wanted was the schedule to be followed.
"That's my call,i guess..." Y/N giggled and moved her hand away from Bill's.
"Forever i-i-in m-my huh-heart,Y/N." Bill said,his cheeks slightly pink.
"Forever in my heart,Bill."
They both smiled at each other and saying goodbye,they took their seperate ways; Bill towards the road the others losers had followed. Y/N towards her mother's car.
She didn't know what life had in store for her. At that moment,maybe it didn't even matter.
Y/N had gotten the best present a girl could ever ask for.
And for that,she was happy
