In My Life

Chapter 10:

That night, as John and Olivia got closer to their homes, she noticed he had not been quite himself since he had seen Paul. He exchanged a few words here and there, but he wasn't like his obnoxious, drunk, and talkative self with her.

Olivia cleared her throat and peered over at John as he stared up at the sky, exhaling the smoke from his cigarette. She waited and rolled her eyes when he had not taken notice of her, "Okay, it's time to let it out now."

He slowly turned his head towards her with a smile on his face, "Ya mean, right here?" John knew that Olivia was trying to pick at his brain, and he didn't want her to. The truth was, he was conflicted on whether Paul should join the band. He wanted him to, he did, but he wasn't so sure what the others had thought or felt about bringing in somebody like him; somebody who knew about music.

Olivia nodded, "Well, yes. I've been waitin' this entire time.." Her sentence cut off when she saw John laughing and unzipping his pants, "Oh for Christ sakes now. I didn't mean that!"

He quickly zipped up his pants, laughing from the slight smile that had emerged on her face, "Oh, that's not what you wanted?"

"You've been thinkin' 'bout that McCartney fellow, haven't ya?" Olivia wasted no time to get down to the truth. She waited for an answer, and because he was so stubborn, he didn't respond. Her eyes gazed up at the stars and sighed, "Well, for what it's worth, I think he's good."

He stopped in his tracks and dropped his cigarette to the ground, "Ya think so?"

"I do.." she could tell from the stare in his eyes that he was beginning to stress about it, "Ya don't have to be so stubborn and keep things from me."

By noticing the frustrated look on her face, he couldn't help but laugh, "Ah, ya know I'm always stubborn," he shook his head and sighed, "I don't know what to do, ya know. He's good; he's fuckin' gear. We could use him, and if I wanna get somewhere, I need the best. But.."

"But.." she repeated, stepping a little closer towards him, "But what?"

John shrugged, "I feel that he'll bring some attitude to the group, ya know?"

She couldn't help the small smile that formed on her face, "Ya mean more attitude than you?" Olivia waited for a reaction from him, but he was unamused, "Alright, alright, but regardless, you should do what you feel you need to do. If you want him in the band, ask him to join. If you don't, then don't worry about it. Plain an' simple."

He paused a moment, staring at her as his thoughts wandered. John didn't want to be stuck in Liverpool the rest of his life and wanted to follow and pursue his dream of making a rock 'n roll band famous. He knew that he had the drive and potential to do that, and while thinking all of this, he could also see Paul with that same passion and drive to get the band where John wanted to go.

"Ya know, I want him in the band. I'm gonna tell Pete tomorrow to find that McCartney and tell him he's in if he wants in," John's gaze turned back to Olivia's and couldn't help the big smile on his face, "Ya know, I love you."

Wait a minute; what did she just hear? She blinked a few times, confused about what he had just said, "I'm sorry, what did ya say?"

He placed his hand to the crook of her back and pulled her closer, making it to where he was suddenly looking deep into her eyes, "I said that I love ya, didn't ya know that?"

She searched his eyes for any sign or signal that he was fooling around or joking with her, but the longer they stared into one another's eyes, the more she knew that he was indeed serious. Her body became still, and her voice remained silent; she was scared, but at the same time, she didn't know what else to expect.