Hold Me Tight

EPILOGUE

All these years, I thought no one  would change me, or the way I believe in love, until I met this girl...

It is a boring day when my eyes caught Jimin staring at the building next to ours.

Sinundan ko ang tingin niya and there I saw a girl being bullied.

No wonder. My mind says as I scanned her look. She's wearing an eyeglasses, she has a messy hair too, and the way she dress herself, yeah no wonder she's being bullied.

Days have passed when Jimin invited me for a dinner at their house.

"What is it this time, Jiminie pabo?" I asked with a boring look on my face.

"Magshishift ako."

I knew he would, hindi ako nagulat. I saw how his eyes follow that nerd.

"Wala ka man lang reaksyon?"

"I know you will. You're to obvious." I said and met his shocked eyes.

"I like her. No, I think I love her." This time, ako naman ang nanlaki ang mga mata.

"You're crazy."

"I am." He replied with a smile on his face.

This short guy is finally in love.

Thursday. The only day I can practice since most of CCA members use the practice building.

I hid myself inside the AVR since everyone is busy using other practice rooms.

I started to play my saxophone. It's been ages since the last time I held my baby. Yes, my treasure.

As I press every key, memories starts to come back. I remember how she held my hand, her hugs and kisses, and the way she smiled at me.

Damn. After all these years, I still can't forget Jessica.

Napahinto ako sa pagtugtog ng maramdaman ang yapak mula sa entrance ng AVR. Doon ko nakita ang babaeng tinitingnan palagi ni Jimin. Ang dahil ng paglipat niya ng ibang department.

"You!" Tawag ko ng pansin sakanya.

"Ay pretty!" Bakas ang gulat sakanyang mukha. Lumapit ako sa kinaroroonan niya.

"Why are you here? What are you doing here? Who are you?" Sunod sunod kong tanong kahit kilala ko na siya.

Sasagot pa sana siya ng dumating si Jimin.

"Do you know it's rude to invade someone's privacy?" Asik na tanong ko sa babaeng ito.

"V, let me explain for Jess."

"Shut your mouth, Jimin. I'm talking to this nerd."

"Chill your ass, V! She's my friend. If you have any issues about it, talk to me tomorrow instead. Alis na kami." Sunod sunod na sabi ni Jimin at lumabas na.

Jess, huh?

Napataas ang isang kilay ko sa pangalan niya.

I guess Jimin and I are really brothers, how we both like girls named Jess.

Months have passed at palagi kaming nagkakaroon ng encounter. Jimin has been hanging out with that girl, in our circle, BTS. It's really annoying, actually. How the members adore that nerd.

There was once a time na nagsubuan pa sila sa harap ng Bangtan. Sa inis ko ay nagwalk out ako. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero naiinis ako.

Sa bawat araw na nakikita ko siya, lalo akong naiinis. Narerealize ko kung bakit siya ginusto ni Jimin. Kung bakit tinanggap siya ng Bangtan maliban kay Meg.

"Sinusundan mo ba ako?"

Napatawa ang kalooban ko sa reaksyon.

Ideny ko man o hindi sakanya, oo ang sagot. Gusto kong malaman kung anong meron sakanya. Gusto ko siyang makilala. Gusto ko rin malaman kung bakit nararamdaman kong kailangan ko siyang protektahan.

Damn, V. You should guard your heart first.

Bumalik si Jessica, nakikipagbalikan siya. Sa bawat taon na ininda ko, nangulila ako, kinaya ko ng wala siya. Akala ko mahal ko pa siya, but my heart starts to doubt when I met her eyes as she watch me and Jessica talking.

Hinabol ko siya and there I confirmed what I feel. Gusto ko nga siya.

Ayoko mang aminin ang nararamdaman ko ay di ko na mapigilan. I felt sorry for Jimin. I felt sorry for myself. For all this time, I built my walls but Jessie break those down without an effort.

"I don't fucking need you."

My chest hurts as I watch her leave. Hindi pwedeng siya ang maging dahilan ng pagkakaroon ng lamat sa pagkakaibigan namin ni Jimin. Bro's before hoes.

"Tell me, Jessie. Why am I confusing you?"

"Stop making it harder."

Napatawa ang isipan ko. Yeah, mahirap nga, Jessie. I already fell.

"Can you trust me, please?"

Can you trust someone as dangerous as me, Jessie?

"Don't judge the things I did for Jessie kasi ako gumawa ako ng paraan. Ginawa ko ang makakaya ko para sakanya, para sa mahal ko. So don't act that you win this game, Taehyung. Hindi pa ako tapos."

Akala ko sobrang tatag ko na, na wala na akong kinatatakutan. Sa hirap at sakit ba naman na naramadaman ko, akala ko immune na ako. Pero hindi, itinaya ko ang pagkakaibigan namin ni Jimin. Ako na palaging nasa receiving end ay lalong naging selfish. Ngayon, natatakot tuloy ako na maagaw siya sa akin.

"Take a risk on me, Jessie. And I'll make you the happiest."

My heart burst from happiness as she held my hand. Hindi ko alam kung anong meron sakanya at ako pa rin ang pinili niya. Sa kabila ng kagaguhan ko, sa pagkakaroon ng magulong isipan, matalas na pananalita, ay ako pa rin ang pinili niya.

"I like it better when you call me V but I like it best when you utter my name."

"Eyes on me, Jessie."

I know this is the right time. I risked my heart for this girl. It's time to give her the assurance because Jessie deserves it. She deserves to be loved.

"I love you, Jessie. Mahal kita."

And there I held here tight as my lips made it's way to her.

I closed my eyes and savoured the moment.

This moment is where I belong. Right now. This time. With the woman I love.