Temptation Of Grey

Chapter 2 - First Conversation

At first, Ben's condition is still very bad. He is barely conscious and sleeps restless. Rey changes bandages regularly, supplies him with water and checks his temperature. She worries, but she feels inside her that the worst is over.

After a few days she is astonished to see that he got up on his own when she came back from the ship with more supplies.
"You're awake," she says cautiously to him "are you feeling better? Would you like something to eat? "

Ben looks at her suspiciously," Why are you here? I did not ask for it."

Rey takes a deep breath - well that will be a great conversation now - she thinks and sighs,"I was called to you through our connection. By the way: nothing to thank for saving your life."

Ben looks blankly into her eyes: "I wanted to destroy Luke and the resistance, I wanted to finish it ... I knew you were with them and I did not care, so why would you want to save me after my General has betrayed me?"

Now she gets angry: "Its not right, that you did not care, you were just thankful for the anger after we get separated. This has made you crazy. A very good mood, if you do not want to deal with loss." She raises an eyebrow and provokes him with her words and gesture.

Ben's answer comes quickly and threateningly softly: "You know nothing about my motivation, my thoughts and feelings, so save the smart words."

"You forget that we are connected. I can look into you, just like you in me. So you save the fuss" she replies angrily "I still feel the conflict in you, still can feel how torn you are." She now speaks more calmly and approaches him determinedly, until she stands directly in front of him "Ben ... why don't you honestly admit it. I see the truth ... "

Ben feels pressured and therefore he replies fiercely: "Well, if we want to be honest here and openly expose our feelings ... why don't we start with yours?" Rey returns his gaze firmly, does not avoid him, although she is little scared of what he will say next.

"As you said, we can look into the others mind. And do you want to know what I see and feel in your heart? I feel anger in you. Rage at your parents who have left you. And doubt. Doubt to your friends from the resistance, whether their way is the right one. And fear"

He closes his eyes and concentrates fully on her. Rey knows she should shut herself up, but she can't do it, she does not want to do it anymore, so she closes her eyes and lets him in completely.
"This crazy fear of loneliness ... she almost crushes you ... and I see ..." He opens his eyes and stares in disbelief and confusion down her face "I see ... me ... your feelings for me ..." he falls silent and Rey opens her Eyes "And what exactly do you see there?" She says quietly without taking his eyes off him.

He answers hesitantly: "There is compassion for me and ... affection" he glares at her almost angrily "why is there affection?" He asks demandingly.

"I do not know" she says seriously, looking directly at his face, his eyes, the scar, and his mouth. "I do not know for the sake of it, but I know it is like it is, and that you feel the same for me" He remains silent and does not answer, because both know that it is true.

"All I know is, that it is like this. Whether it has anything to do with this force connection or whatever, I came here to find out, to save you and to give you some important information concerning both of us. You deserve this information as much as I do. What you make of it will then be up to you"

Both continue to stand close together and the closeness disturbs and calms them both in a strange way in equal parts.
"Our connection is special," she whispers, "can't you feel that?" He just nods, also trapped by the strong energy that seems to pulse between them, just like in the cabin on Ahch-To, as in the elevator, as in the throne room.

"And I found out why that is and what it means to us. You just have to listen to me once instead of constantly trying to somehow manipulate or dominate me. I realize that you are trying it all the time and it will not work anyway, so leave that at last!"

She raises her eyebrows impatiently and he looks at her in frustration but also fascinated. "It's in my nature to try this, Rey," he says quietly, almost flattering to her, which makes her a little bit embarrassed.

"No, you were brought up to try that ... that's something completely different," she replies, "and it's good that you can't get away to do this with me because it's wrong." She sighs, "You should eat something first, then I will tell you what I know"

At first, he leans even closer to her and Rey gasps. The two pause for a moment in absolute silence, but then he leans back slowly and says exhausted: "I think that's a good idea".