Ah~ you said it right. I was "just curious" and went far enough to try the curiosity.
Things goes many different ways out of curiosity and what we had could've ended up in a different way it did. It definitely wasn't love! I made that clear to you at the start. What did I always tell you when you you'd ask me "what do you want?"
Whenever you'd ask me that, the answer was the same wasn't it, although I really started developing something out of "my comfort zone" for you and maybe try to embrace it because only you made me feel that way and maybe it was right to "challenge" myself with this new curiosity of mine, I was ready to test it.
I did leave you for my own sake. I didn't want to get hurt. Yes that's true. I didn't want to get hurt any longer. You'd hurt me all the time.
Simplest questions constantly unanswered. I understand.
A simple explanation also not given for the reason why you wouldn't answer those simple questions. I had enough.
You told me to leave because "you knew your rights" – so that was my opportunity to Not get hurt any longer and I took it. Not looking back because whatever was going on wouldn't take us anywhere. I wouldn't stop asking those questions....ever.
You see I couldn't trust you any longer - you've given me reasons not to and thats why we are how we are now.
If you were looking for something more than what I gave you, then were you expecting me to go on with it when I knew nothing abt you when you knew more than enough abt me? Not fair. Seriously not fair at all.
And you're saying i left because you "wasn't the one I'm looking for"? Seriously? First I wasn't looking for anyone, that time I missed you so I talked to you not really expecting anything other than being friends and talk to you. Didn't I make that clear?
Yes like you... and as I said in a different context. You'd understand if you read it from the start (or not - you don't understand much 100% of what I mean).
»»--------»»--------»»--------»»--------
Re-readings this because I can see the traits of your lie.
"You told me to leave because "you knew your rights""
This is how you'd cover your lies back then. Why hadn't I see that? Now that I think about it. When these were said I'd think ' well stranger danger, so she might not want to say anything because of it' or 'she might be ashamed of where she's from!?' But it's all clear now. I know now. I've been a fool.
"You see I couldn't trust you any longer - you've given me reasons not to and thats why we are how we are now."
Now i have the ultimate reason not to, but back then I still did trust you and it was stupid what was going through my mind??? Honestly *sighs*
I still don't understand tbh but I'll leave it to be forgotten.
