So Sad

2- Now You See Me

When I woke up I was in bed alone. the sun was brighter then ever and the air was fresh. I sat up in the bed thinking. there was the smell of pancakes that filled the air and the sound of guitar playing loud. I remembered the man that helped me and I thought about what I should say to him,how should I thank him. soon I heard footsteps and the guitar stop, the footsteps grew louder and closer until there was a light knock on the door. "come in." I said loudly but my voice was a bit hoarse. when the man from last night entered the room he had pancakes and milk on a tray and set it down on the night stand, with a smile on both of our faces. "good morning!" he chuckled "same too you." I told him and he pointed to the food "for you." he smiled leaning in a bit. He was handsome. "oh you shouldn't have you really didn't nee-" he cut me off as I babbled on "I'm saying this in the nicest way possible you look horrible like you haven't eaten in weeks your skinny and you need to eat." he put a lot of expression in his words and in thought about it. he was right I haven't eaten in 8 weeks but I still am not sure because I haven't even took a look in the Mirror. I looked at him and then at the food back to him I gave him a look of 'thankfulness' and ate. it felt so good I forgot the way things tasted I loved this and my body loved this. I was filled with energy and fullness when the plate was finished, I may have looked like a pig devouring these pancakes but goddammit they were the best thing. when I completely finished I looked back at him and he laughed silently to himself. "So let's talk.." he said while he stood up removing his shoes and moving to sit on the bed with me. "okay." I looked at him with excitement filled in my eyes. "who are you?" he asked sounding a bit unsure "uhh my name is Lexi I think.." I told him biting my lip but it was true I wasn't fully aware of my name I didn't even have a past name I was just Lexi but I was sexi Lexi to all the men. "I'm saul, Saul Hudson but em everyone and anyone calls me slash." he smiled offering me to shake his hand so I did. I got embarrassed because my hand wasn't soft it was rough and had scars. Sure enough turned my hand to look at all of my scars. he lifted my hand up and kissed it exactly where my biggest and worst scar on my hand was. it made me blush him kissing my hand but it made me happy because he doesn't know the stories behind them but he still cares. "How old are you?" I asked him trying to see past his hair "21 and you?" he asked me getting more comfortable "20 umm can you tell me about yourself?" I asked him. it's crazy how I trusted him and wanted to get to know him because that's not me he just had a spell on me. "like I said my name is slash, born in London I'm black and British. I'm in a band Guns & Roses, not bragging by were pretty big,famous. My mom is Ola she designs clothes my father Anthony designs album covers. & I play guitar." He spoke past his curls. he seemed harmless to me but Im still unsure,that's just how I think sadly. "well my name is Lexi like I said and 20.... Umm I really don't have a job umm that's all about me." I told him but I had to stop quickly because I felt a lump in my throat and the tears built up. I couldn't tell him I couldn't! "that's it?" he asked leaning in and looking into my eyes. he noticed something's wrong I know he did. he grabbed me and laid me on top of him. he held me close and rubbed my back,softly patting it. "if you don't wanna tell me it's fine but just know I am here to hold you." He whispered into my ear with his head resting upon my own. "I was a week old when my mother left my in a dumpster 3 days after a police officer found me and got custody over me when I was 8 he raped me the police officers helped me and I was sent to Daniday foster home I was beat everyday and raped every week. I ran away when I was 14 when I ran away from there and a 16 year old boy took me home with his family In the day I was used as a stripper, At night I was raped and was drugged all the time. I ran from there at 16 and was token by an old man who kept me in a small room and he'd raped me never feeding me. when I was finally free from there I slept on different guy's couches all the time. when I took off I was walking down alleys and yesterday a group of guys pulled up and took me in their car all raping me and then that's when you saved me." I told him as all the tears fell like rain. he held me tighter and I heard his sigh. I laid there crying and he laid there protecting me from anything and everything. we laid there for an hour when I woke up I knew I had to go. I grabbed the clothes from before and right when I was going to walk out he woke up "where are you going?" he asked concerned as he sat up. "it's time for me to go thank you for everything." I turned and walked to him. "wait you can't go where will you leave to?" he asked while we tightly hugged. when I pulled away I moved his hair out the way getting a way better look at his face. His eyes looked worried "I don't know but I cannot take up your space." I told him and I placed my hand on his cheek "you aren't taking up any space I need you here I don't want you out there in trouble again." He looked deep into my eyes. but I knew I couldn't stay here I knew I couldn't. "I'm sorry." I hugged him and he didn't say any words. I walked out the bedroom door and out the front door. I walked down the street to where ever I felt like going.