African beauty

Chapter 19 - Where to?

Hello guys! I'm so happy to be writing again. I honestly felt as though nobody was really appreciating my work, and it started to feel as though I was doing it more for reads than what I initially loved to do - Write. I needed some time to get myself together and decide for myself what I needed to do, but i'm back again. I hope you enjoy this one. Leave comments as to your theories! I enjoy hearing them. Love to everybody that supports me! 

I was sat in the guest room of the Connors, and I had just finished praying. Now I know what you're thinking, Erica, you only pray when it is convenient, and apart from that, you drink, smoke, and have sex with two brothers. You are a fucking hypocrite. Let me just say it before you do. I may not be the perfect christian my parents envisaged for me to be, but I was trying. Sometimes, life's trails and tribulations prevent you from building relationships and growing in individual things, but at the end of the day, God is meant to be an understanding God. A passionate God. I mean, he did take my mother away from me. And it is his fault, because if he did not make sex so enjoyable, nobody would want to engage in it so bad. Also, did you know that the stereotypical white Jesus is complete void? Jesus was said to have kinky hair and darker skin. Anyway, as I was looking into bare space, Alex came in, looking slightly drunk. You could tell that he had a few drinks prior. "I love you, Erica. I cant even explain how much I love you. You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. I'm so glad to have you in my life" said Alex, in utter drunkenness. "You're drunk, baby" I said, as if to lure him to what he knew I needed. "You need to sleep, Er. You've had a long day. If you need anything, i'm just next door" said Alex, as he closed the door and slicked his beautiful, straight brown hair back. He looked significantly paler. It was always so fascinating to me how Caucasian hair obeyed their every touch and direction, while my kinky hair did what it wanted on any given day. Nevertheless, I felt guilty, because no matter what Alex said or did, a part of me wanted Oliver's touch, and his sweet words while I stroked his hair as he laid on my lap, talking about how soft my thighs were. Sometimes, he would grab my thighs and kiss them, while sneakily putting his hand up my skirt. His smile alone could turn my horrible day to a complete roller coaster. I knew I was wrong for these thoughts, and I felt incredibly bad that I was feeling this for the brother of my lover. I loved Alex without a doubt, but something was missing, and I did not know what. I quickly got out of my thoughts and went to sleep, hoping I would not live to see the next day.

The next day came, and I dreaded it. I would have to see Oliver, but he could only see me with his eyes and  not his heart or his soul. "Hello Erica, nice to see you again" said Oliver, with the smile on his face that I was unfamiliar with. "Hello Olly. I mean Oliver. You look good. Have you been going to the gym?" I said, as I touched his arm in the way I used to, to jog his memory. "Five times a week. Bloody pain in the arse but it pays off" he said, attempting to shove me off without coming off as rude. He still did not remember me. I held back my tears and proceeded to go to the dining table, where a full breakfast was set up. I had no Idea how this was prepared or with what time, but I knew that I was hungry; and I did not care that I had not brushed my teeth. I sat down, about to dig in, when Mr Connor came out. His stomach had gotten substantially bigger since the last time I saw him. "Good morning..." he said, and he turned to me. Alex knew exactly what he was about to say. "I swear to God dad, say anything out of line and I will slap you across your wrinkled, old face. I'm tired of you lot. This is not the 1960s" said Alex, with a stern face. As he was saying this, I noticed a slight jolt in Oliver, but it died down just as fast. Was he remembering something about me? It did not matter, because nothing happened. He just sat there, emotionless. "She is the fucking reason my son lost his damn memory. This nigger right here. This slag has you blind, and you don't even see it. What does she have? Big boobs and a big arse? Is that it?" said Mr Connor. I tried my hardest to save my reaction, because I was not going to go back and forth with an Old man. That little glimmer of respect I was raised with constricted me. "I'm honestly out of here" I said, as I took my school bag, headed for the door. I could hear them arguing, and all of a sudden, I heard a comment that was obviously directed at me. "You will never marry my sons, I don't want nigger grandchildren!" said Mr Connor. After that moment, it felt like everything was sped up with an efficient remote control. I dropped my bag abruptly and ran towards him, grabbing his tie aggressively. "You're a fucking nuisance! You fucker you! A fucking drug dealer scared of nigger children! Ha! You should be scared that somebody like you would ever walk the face of the fucking earth ever again! Don't ever try to call me a nigger when you're the number one most horrible fucking person in the U.K.!" I said, screaming so hard and aggressively that I could see my saliva on his face. Everybody started to stare at me. It was evident that I was not supposed to know any of this information, and I had just blurted it out, like a complete idiot. But what would you do if somebody was calling you a nigger, and scared for "nigger grandchildren"? Okay, you may have been a little bit more relaxed, but it was not the first time experiencing racism from this Old cunt. The time I came to Oliver's house while Alex was in prison, I needed to take a shower, and it just so happened to be wash day for my hair, so I had asked Olly to get me a wide toothed comb, shampoo and conditioner from super-drug. He came back and I had washed my hair, but forgot to pick the hair up and flush it down the toilet, like my mother always urged me to do, for fear of "juju". I wont even go into details about that. Anyway, after about an hour or two, he came out running from Oliver's room, saying that he had found nigger hair and he almost threw up. There were times that were even more unbearable. It was my breaking point, and I knew that nothing would hurt him more than for him to know that I knew everything about his dirty business. However, after I had said that, he turned to Alex and Oliver, with an angry face that clearly stated "I knew one of you fucking told her, and I will kill you lot". "I don't even know her" said Oliver. Alex threw his hands into the air, saying that he said nothing, and she probably found out from other external sources. But, I caught Alex smirking at me, as if to approve of what I had just done. Oliver however, had mixed feelings. "Lord save our fucking souls. Let me drive you lot to school" he said, with a perplexed look on his face as he stared at me. Oliver could not go to school, as he needed regular checkups and medications to make sure his memory did not get worse. We took our bags and he drove us to school.

I was in the front seat, fuming, while Alex was in the back seat, just staring at me blankly. When we got to school, Oliver said, "just call me if you need anything. Here Erica, let me give you my number". He had no idea that I already had his number. "It okay, Alex will give it to me" I said, as I made a mad dash out of the car so that he would not ask any further questions. On our walk to the school premises, Alex was still looking at me, smirking profusely. "Why are you looking at me like that, mate?" I said to the completely dazed Alex. "Nothing, you just look very sexy when you're extremely angry" he said. "Shut up Olly" I said, pushing him slightly and playfully. We got into school and went our separate ways. As I was in class, all I could think about was the reaction Oliver had during breakfast. It looked as though he had a quick flash of memory, but it was either unidentifiable or he disregarded it. During last period, I had slipped, and I inevitably fell into a pool of water, so I decided to go early, because Hailshaw students were not the nicest. I texted Alex and Oliver, just to let them know where I would be. I took the bus to the traffic light before their house, and walked for about 15 minutes to their house.

 When I had arrived, I noticed that the door was slightly open, and I could hear people talking, but there was that raspy voice again, that I remembered when Oliver was in the hospital. "Now now, lets not be too hasty. The girl is in your house, but she is smart and cunning. You must act like I tell you to.  Don't run where you should walk" said the raspy voice. "I will do as you say, master, but she needs to be taken down soon. She knows all my secrets. She even shifted my sons focus" said Mr Connor. "That is why I took the memory of the other one. I know exactly what to do to get him back on track. You just have to execute it" said the raspy voice. "Yes, master" said Mr Connor. I was so terrified. Who was this voice? and what kind of "focus" does it mean? It was incredibly confusing. When Oliver and Alex came back, I told them everything I had heard. "That's ridiculous, Er. I'm sorry but it makes absolutely no sense" said Alex, folding his arms. Oliver, on the other hand, was fairly quiet, and took time to analyse the situation. "Its not all stupid, Alex. There's no reason for her to lie in my opinion" he said, as he shrugged. "Just...watch your back okay Alex?" I said, almost shedding tears. Alex nodded and proceeded to go into his room. Oliver, however, stayed in my room, in the same spot. "I feel like you should sleep with me tonight. Or Alex. You're not safe alone, innit?" he said, with a deeply concerned face. I nodded, and he left. I wished I had said more, or tried to jog is memory, or even tried to ask him about what happened at breakfast. But I stayed silent. I went into the bathroom, wanting to take a quick shower, when I saw writing on the mirror. It was poorly written. "You are going down, Erica" said the writing, and attached to it was a drawing of me, in this exact spot, with the exact same reaction, but with a man in a hooded cloak behind me. On the drawing it wrote "I am always with you". I immediately dashed out the bathroom and showed everything to Alex. He ripped them up and looked me in the eye. "Listen, its not big fucking deal yeah. Somebody is fucking with you" he said, as he went back to sleep as he had been doing. I walked out, shedding tears, when I saw Oliver. "I guess you're staying with me then yeah" he said, smiling. I nodded and he let me into his room, of which I remembered perfectly from the last time I came here. "Its not much, but you can sleep on the left side while I sleep on the right. Or I could sleep on the floor" said Oliver. It was obvious that he wanted us side by side. I smiled mildly and got on the right side, while he took the left side. Before he slept, he whispered "I feel like i've known you for a long time, Erica" he said as he fell asleep. When he was fully asleep, I said "That's because you do know me, Olly", as I stroked his hair. I prayed quietly yet aggressively that night. "Jesus, are you there? please make it all better".