One happy family (kind of) {PJO/HOO fan fic}

YouTube (Nico and Hazel)

(The art at the top is by: ikimaru. Isn't it lovely?)

Channel: Golden dead

Hazel/Nico: "Hello! Nico and Hazel here!"

Nico: "So, Hazel, what are we doing today?"

Hazel: "I don't know, brother, What are we doing?"

Nico: "You didn't *BLEEP* tell me! How am I suppose to know!"

Hazel: "Hahaha! I'm going to have to bleep that out."

Nico: "Just tell me what we're doing."

Hazel: "Haha, you're going to hate this."

Nico: "What is it!"

*Person behind camera laughs*

Nico: "Shut up, Will. Do you know what we're doing?!"

Will, still behind camera: "Yeah, I- Pfft- I know! Hahaha!"

Hazel: "BRING ME THE BAG!"

Frank: *Walks in, holding a paper bag* "Don't mind me, just bringing the bag."

Nico: *Looks in bag* *Gasps* "No."

Hazel: "YES!"

Nico: "NO! Hazel, why?!"

Hazel: "Will suggested it!"

Nico: *Glares behind camera (A.K.A. at Will)*

Will: "...................................."

Nico: "*BLEEP* YOU, WILL!!

Will: "Nico! This is suppose to be a family friendly channel!"

Nico: "I DON'T *BLEEP* CARE!" *Gets up* "We're braking up!" * walks away*

Hazel: "NICO, GET BACK HERE-"

*Jump cut to Hazel sitting calmly and next to her Nico is held down by Will, very, very, angrily*

Hazel: "We're sorry about that,erm, interuption (?). Now, Nico, would you like to tell the nice people what we're doing?"

Nico: "*mumbles* I don't even know. All I know is there's makeup in the bag."

Will: "I'm sorry! I didn't know You guys would actually do it!"

Nico: *Starts cussing out Will in Italian*

Will: *Blushes* "S-stop."

Nico: *smirks*

Hazel and Frank, who is now behind the camera: "Awww."

Hazel: "Actually, Nico, you won't have to put any of it on."

Nico: "I won't!"

Hazel: "Nope. Because you're putting it on me!"

Nico: "......."

Hazel: "It's an experiment."

Nico: "........"

Hazel: "To see if it's true that gay people can put on makeup well."

Nico: ".......... So I have the power to make you look like anything?"

Hazel: "Umm... I guess? Not really?"

Nico: "But, like... It's like face paint, isn't it?"

Hazel: "I'm starting to rethink this."

*Jump cut to everyone in there original places*

Nico: "So, I start with foundation, right?"

Hazel: "Yes, that's right."

Nico: "Um, okay... This is foundation? Or is it concealer? They look the same."

Hazel: "That's foundation, Nico."

Nico: *Puts some on Hazel's face* "It's too light. Do we have a darker shade?"

Frank: "That's the darkest shade we found at the drug store."

Nico: "Are you kidding me? This makeup is setting me up for failure."

(A/N Yes it's true that a lot of makeup isn't dark enough for people with darker skin tones, and it is a problem.)   

Nico: "I'll just blend it, now." *Looks at supply's* "What do I blend it with?"

Hazel: "With-"

Will: "Don't tell him!"

Hazel: "Bu-"

Will: "Let him figure it out!"

Nico: "Want to know what I hate about you, sweetheart?"

Will: "What is it, love?"

Nico: "YOU'RE A BUTT HOLE!"

Hazel: "Language."

Nico: "I didn't curse."

Hazel: "JUST BLEND THE *BLEEP* MAKEUP, NICO!" 

Everyone: *Gasps, because Hazel cursed*

Nico: "HAZEL LEVESQUE, GO WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP!"

Hazel: *Stands up* "YOU'RE NOT MY MOTHER!"

Nico: *Stands up, as well* "DON'T USE THAT TONE OF VOICE ON ME!"

Will: "Calm down, you two."

Nico: "*BLEEP* You, Will!" 

Will: "I mean, if you want to."

Hazel: "This is fAMILY FRIENDLY!"

Nico: " *BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP* Weasel *BLEEEEEEEP*"

*Screen goes black*

*When screen lights up again: Frank is sitting alone at the table, obviously disheveled, and the room is a mess*

Frank: "This video will be cut short, because of... Reasons. I.... Apologize... For wasting your time (?) and.... I hope you have a good day..."

*Recording stops.*