Back to You (Sequel to Take Me Away From Here)

Chapter 14

Faith POV: 

Tim made an executive decision, and one that I frankly have to agree with. Although we argued relentlessly about it, I have to say that I honestly feel a lot safer with it. Weston isn't exactly thrilled with the plan, as most boyfriends would be when they hear their girlfriend's ex-husband is moving back in with her. 

My initial worry was about this possibly adding fuel to the fire, which it probably is. There is no better way to say fuck you than to do exactly what he told me not to do. That worry was dulled, due to Tim's point, in that he can no longer play the game of fake distress calls when we are literally down the hall from one another. Among the other perks, having one of us near the kids at all times was an additional factor. Tim even went above and beyond and hired a private security team, which mostly just sits out by the road since I don't have a gate. 

My mind keeps going back to the dream I had the night Tim was jumped... 

"Okay Nurse Ratchet, let's ease up on the pushing my knee the wrong way." Tim spits out, grunting a bit as he snaps me out of my brief trance. I shake it off, before letting his knee relax. I've been helping him out with physical therapy, which doesn't please Weston one bit. He knows Tim and I often relapse with feelings for each other. I guess he just doesn't trust my ability to stay away from him, and I'd honestly have to agree with his stance. 

"How does it feel today?" I ask curiously, while having him rotate his hip. He grips onto the edges on the yoga mat, appearing to be breaking into a cold sweat.

"Hurts like a bitch... still. The doctor said it'd be a day to day thing, but it seems like it's stalling out at the 'hurting like a bitch' rank right now." He explains, taking a deep breath while looking like he could get sick. 

"Do you need a break?" I  offer, hating the fact that I'm causing him so much pain. He nods, letting his leg relax. He leans back on his hands, while I sit down beside his legs. "I don't think you've gone through something like this before." I release, although I don't know why I had to say it. He nods once more, sighing while glancing up at the ceiling. 

"I don't think anything has ever hurt this bad. I mean, it's just constant throbbing... I'm just eager to get back to normal." He says, making me wince. In the dream, he never got back to normal, even after twenty or so years. That said, it was just a dream. It was just a dream, right? 

"It'll get better with time." I release half-heartedly. He narrows his eyes at me, before clearing his throat. 

"What's on your mind, Faith?" He questions, effortlessly seeming to know. I shrug, before biting my lip. Is there a point in telling him? What if I just cause him more stress, and it is just a dream? Who am I kidding, it is just a dream. I don't have some superpower that helps me see the future, nor am I like Patsy Cline was (reportedly, of course). 

"I just... I had a dream of our family years from now, and I wasn't there." I explain vaguely. He looks down at his knees, nodding slowly while inhaling the thought. "You were really distraught and upset, and that threw me off." I say, picking at my nails for a moment to occupy my hands. 

"What threw you off? The fact that I was upset?" He asks, sounding like he's almost offended. I stare, unsure how to answer the question. I don't really know what I mean by that. I guess it was the scope of how upset he was, even years down the line. "Faith, if I lost you, I'd probably have to go spend some time on a loony farm." He says confidently, making me wince. Words like that don't exactly bring me peace. 

"I'd want you to hold your head high. Losing me wouldn't be the end of the world." I respond, trying to get him to tell me he'll be alright. He shakes his head. 

"It'd be the end of mine. You've been the axis my world revolves around for so long that I just don't know what I'd do." He reinstates, making my head pound. Silence falls, before Gracie busts in the room. She's still slightly apprehensive around Tim, which is a little disheartening. That said, I should be more apprehensive near him. She sits down on the couch and takes a deep breath, watching us watch her. 

"So... are you two back together, or what?" She lets out, being rather direct. Tim stares, before turning toward me. I laugh, feeling like the question is ridiculous. 

"No, honey. I'm seeing Weston." I remind her, watching Tim look down at the ground. I fight the urge to roll my eyes. He's so indecisive with things like this. She nods slowly, sighing a bit. 

"Alright, just checking." She excuses, standing up and leaving the room. I wince, knowing that Tim's not going to let the conversation drop. 

"What would I have to do?" Tim asks, making my chest ache. I bite my lip, before get onto my feet and beginning to clean up to avoid answering. "Faith, come on..." He calls out. I shrug, stopping in my place and looking at him. 

"Tim, we are toxic together... We can't keep trying this, because someone always gets hurt." I assert, watching him nod. He breathes slowly, seeming to be deep in thought. 

"What could I do to change that?" He asks, blowing me away with the fact that he's simply ignoring me. "I get that we bump heads, and that when we fight it's like world war III, but there's... there's nothing out there like what we have. I know it takes a lot of time, and energy, and pain to get things where they work for us, but I'm willing to put that in. I've made the mistake of losing you before, and I don't plan on making that same mistake again." He says, breaking my heart a little. I shake my head again, shutting my eyes for a moment. "You can't tell me that you're happier with him..." He argues, making me feel slightly offended with the accusation.

"Weston treats me really well, Tim... and I'm happy with him. Life with him is simple, and stable, and that's all I could ask for." I reply, trying to stay dignified. "Plus, he's never tried to kill me while in a drug-induced haze." I fire, stooping down off my high horse. Tim raises his eyebrows, taking a deep breath. My mind returns once more to the dream. The first part seems to linger... the part where he was beside me, watching our little girls draw. I loved that version of him like crazy, and I'd cut off a limb to get that man back. I just feel like that side of him has been destroyed... 

But maybe it's just hidden...