Water Under the Bridge (Snowbarry fanfiction)

Send my love to your new lover

13 months later, 2011
Caitlin's Pov
I wake up in bed but I am alone. Barry isn't in the bed which has been occurring lately and I don't know why. Something has changed with Barry. I love him and I am terrified to loose him.

It's been four years. Four years I've loved him and if he were to leave, I would break. He's all I have and all I want to have.

I think I have something that might make him a little excited though. I slip the surprise in my back pocket and go to find him.

I get out of the bed with my pajamas on and stretch my arms and yawn. I drag myself out of the bed and Barry is asleep on the couch. He goes to bed with me but doesn't wake up with me. I don't get it.

I don't understand why. He knows he can sleep in our bedroom...it's ours.

I walk over to him and gently shake his shoulder to wake him up.

"Barry."

"A what?"

"It's me."

"Oh."

Barry sits up and takes a moment to adapt to everything.

"I'll go make some breakfast." I say as I start to walk to the kitchen.

"How do waffles sound?" I ask  him.

"Good, Yeah. Waffles."

"Yay!" I say slightly ecstatic since I love making them.

He turns away and it's like he's trying to breathe.

"Barry, what's wrong?" I ask extremely worried.

"It's nothing, Cait."

"Do you still love me?" I ask because of my super anxiety of him falling out of love with me.

"I-um. Yeah."

Usually him saying 'yes' makes me feel relieved but it doesn't feel like it this time. This time it felt like they were just words and didn't mean anything.

The room remains silent as I make the waffles. Fear runs though my body again of the fear of loosing him. Usually my body is filled with love and excitement. Now all I feel in anxiety. I haven't felt like this in years.

I finish the waffles by putting one on each plate. I get some utensils and give Barry his plate.

"Thank you, Cait."

"No problem."

He starts to pick around his waffle and I just see pain in his eyes.

"Please tell me what's wrong, Barry."

"It's nothing..."

"Well, I have some exciting news for you."

"You do?"

"Yeah. It'll change our lives forever. We could be happy. We'll have a life and it'll be a good one. Barry-"

"I'm sorry, Caitlin."

"What do you mean?"

"I've been lying to you and you deserve to know the truth."

My entire heart stops and I try my best to not cry. I don't know what he's going to tell me but all I see is pain and guilt in his eyes.

"You can tell me anything. You don't have to lie to me."

"It just- it's really hard."

"Is it something with your family?"

"It's hard to tell you because it'll break your heart and I don't want to see your heart break."

"I can handle it. I promise."