Loving The Mafia Boss [ COMPLETED ]

LTMB-19 "Go"

Ivan's POV

"Oh you're awake?" Taka kong tinignan si Queen na nakatayo sa gilid ko habang may hawak hawak na pitsel ng tubig at baso, tatayo sana ako kaso napansin kong nakatali ang mga kamay at paa ko.  What the fuck? Is she playing tricks with me again? Ipinapapatay ba ako ng Henpin fuka!? Sht.

Its foolish of me to believe her words. Love? Fck I think thats just a worthless word for her, siguro madami na syang nabiktima sa nga salita nyang yan, sa mukha nya, sa acting nya. Tsk. Napatawa ako ng pagak dahil sa iniisip kong 'to. Why did I even go to her? What did I expect?

"Why are you laughing?" Itinuon ni Queen ang kamay nya sa kama kaya parang nakayuko na sya saakin. Dinungaw nya ang mukha ko't inusisa ako.

"I shouldn't have trusted you. If I knew earlier edi sana di nalamang ako lumapit pa sayo! Dapat hindi nalang ako nag tiwala pa na hindi mo na ako lolokohin!" I yelled at her while she just stared at me with confusion in her eyes at ilang saglit namuo ang luha sa mata nya. Ha! I knew it!

"Nagu-guilty ka na ba?! You're a lying bitch." Sigaw ko pa sakanya. I wasn't expecting anything from her pero nangunot ang noo ko ng hinalikan nya ako ng buo sa labi. I tried to resist her yet I can't help but to respond to her kisses I was giving into the temptation pero biglang napangiwi ng kagatin nya ang labi ko, forcefully.

"What the heck b-tch. Why did you bite me!?" Galit na sigaw ko sakanya. At bigla akong nabato sa pagkakahiga at parang natigil ko nga din ang pag hinga ko, this person infront of me is not Queen. Its Queen of Hearts here standing and staring down on me.

She's just standing there staring at me with blank eyes. I can't read her mind and I can't tell what she's going to do next. What are you thinking about? What truly do I mean to you? Am I even important to you?

"Look at you trying to resist my kisses e kanina lang you told me to suck you! You sht head! How can you order me like a slut! I hate you!" I can here her range from her every word and my cool broke down when I heard her sob in between each word.

"Woah. L-look at you acting all the way huh!? Sorry pero hindi mo na ako maloloko!" I tried to compose myself pero masnasira pa ito ng tinanggal nya ang pagkakagapos ko at lumuhod sa harap ko habang umiiyak parin the she held my hand tight. Para bang nag sosorry na sya kahit hindi pa nya sinasabi.

My heart is breaking to pieces when I watch her cry her heart out. No. I should not be swayed by her acting! This is one of many tactics. Tsk. Don't get fooled Ivan! Hindi ka nya minahal dahil mahal ka nya, mahal ka nya dahil misyon ka para sakanya. Tumayo ako't pinipilit na tanggalin ang pagkakahawak nya sa kamay ko pero mashinigpitan nya ang kapit sa akin.

"I-I'm sorry ok. I didn't mean to keep it from you this long. Pero kase alam kong hindi mo ako maiintindihan, you'll not be able to trust me anymore! If I told you that I'm the Mafia's Heir alam kong hindi mo maiintindihan!" Natigilan ako sa narinig ko. She's the next inline in being the Henpin fuka's Queen. Napatawa ako ng pagak, palakas ng palakas naramdaman ko ang pagluha ko. Hindi ko na kaya pa 'to.

I did not expected these shts! That hit me like a blow! Is this my karma? For killing many people? For killing for my own satisfactory. Then karma really hits like a bitch huh?

"You're pouring salt on a fresh wound tsk. I haven't gotten over the pain then you're adding again?! You decieved me!" Marahas ko syang itinulak at napaupo sya sa sahig agad naman akong nag sisi dahil sa ginawa ko, mag sosorry na dapat ako at tutulungan sya sa pagtayo pero tumayo din sya agad kaya di ko na sya natulungan.

"I knew that you wont be able to accept me. Pero hindi ko alam kung bakit ako nasasaktan ng ganto, alam ko na e! Alam ko na naganito ang magiging reaksyon mo. You'll despise me for good now. I know. You wont accept me. I'm aware of everything and am prepared of the consenquence of my reckless action. But remember that I didn't regret the times we spent, being with you was the happiest I've ever been and loving you will never be a mistake, its a choice I willingfully chose..." natulala ako sa sinasabi nya. Are you acting Queen? Are you trying to fool me? Or are you being genuine? I don't know anymore. I can't trust you anymore. Not after I knew who she really is.

Its heartbreaking seeing you like this Queen. Its painful seeing you cry like this. I hate it. I hate feeling this way. Hindi ko alam kung ano ba ang nakain ko at ganto katindi ang naramdaman ko para kay Queen. I've never loved like this, I never loved to begin with. Queen's my first in everything. Maybe its true that first love never comes true huh?

"So now I'm letting you go. Go. Leave me." Those words caught me off guard. I was expecting her to beg me, to stay with me. Any normal girl who loves so much would never let go, but again Queen is not just any girl, she's extraordinary and unique in her own way.

"Queen..." i stepped closer to her para yakapin sya at bawiin ang mga sinabi ko. Pinag sisisihan ko na ang mga sinabi ko, alam kong may dahilan sya, alam kong mahal nya ako at kahit talagang linoloko nya ako wala na akong paki don, mahal ko sya, mahal na mahal, and I'm not repeating the same mistake again, letting you go, away from me, I will not let you go away.

"No! Umalis ka na! You're right! I decieved you! I don't love you. Kaya umalis ka na! Please... tayong dalawa lang ang mahihirapan. Forget about me completely, I'll do the same. You lead your own life without me. Please lang Ivan!" I want to hold her. I want to tell her to stop talking. I want to stop spouting nonesense. I want her to take back all of the things she said. I want to make love to her until she forgets about everything else but me.

I'm so stupid. I'm hurting the one I love. After all those months of chasing her, finding her. Eto pa ang masasabi ko sakanya, I should be making up to her and making her smile as much as I can, pero I made her cry.

"Sorry Queen, I take it back what-" I was stopped from talking when she slapped me and got something from her closet and I was shocked to see her holding a dagger. Would she go to this extent para lang ipakita saakin na wala syang nararamdaman para sakin?

"No. Alam kong hindi mo magagawa saakin yan. Alam kong mahal mo ako, mahal kita. That's all that matters right? We can just love each other secretly to stop commotion." I was coming closer to her pero tumawa sya ng nakakaloko kaya napatigil ako sa pagkilos. Anong nasa isip mo queen?

"Yes I love you... remember that." Nang matapos nyang sabihin yon di ko na alam ang gagawin ko. Napapiit ako ng paghinga, natigil sa pag kilos at di na makapag isip ng matino.

"Goodbye, Love."  At doon lamang ako nakakilos. When she suddenly lost balance and fell to the floor with the blood on her clothes. I quickly moved to her side and put pressure on the wound she made on her wrist then dialed the paramedics.

"No Queen! Hindi pwede. Why the fuck did you do that!? Sht. Madami pa tayong gagawin, magkakaanak pa tayo! Don't die on me. Masusulusyonan natin 'to. Just fight for me." Tears started to fall from my eyes and it landed on her face.

I saw her smile it was just a glimpse but I know. With that, I know. We need to keep fighting.

"I wont let you go."