I trust Harry. I do.
I had repeated these words to myself multiple times within the last five days, attempting to sufficiently drill them into my head, but I couldn't focus much as the boys droned on and on about plans that they had. They were taking things slow with the information they'd gathered from Aspyn. Apparently she had given them some address and they were scoping it out, more reassured after she promised that no harm would come to Gemma, since she was the leverage too.
The six of us were all seated at Harry's home, at the massive table that meetings were usually held at. Harry's arm rested around the back of my chair as I sat between him and Niall. I was pretending to read some romance novel I'd located in the study (which had been my least favorite place in the house since Harry killed a man there), but really I was just trying to make sense of my thoughts.
I hated my insecurities. I hated how one moment I felt close to Harry, and then I reverted right back to being uncertain. I would have liked to blame this solely on my past, but I knew that that wasn't going to work anymore. I needed to talk to Harry about how I was feeling, and then hope for the best.
I couldn't help but feel bad about being so back-and-forth though. Harry knew that something was up with me. As soon as we'd left the agency, he was keeping his distance, as if he could sense that I was deep in thought and didn't want to disrupt it. And after almost a week of this, my own issues were weighing heavily on me. Nothing drastic changed between us, but kisses were less frequent, cuddles weren't quite as cuddly, and most times we were alone together were spent doing separate things or watching movies.
I felt Harry's fingertips brush against the back of my neck and I glanced over, knowing that it wasn't an accident when I caught his eye and he smiled softly. Immediately my stomach twisted in discomfort. I felt so guilty and so horrible inside. Harry didn't deserve this. He was trying so hard to be better, all for the sake of keeping us together, and now I was believing things spewed from a girl who happened to almost quite literally be devil spawn.
I tilted my head back and Harry raised an eyebrow as his hand unintentionally touched my neck again. He left it there though, fingers swirling gentle patterns into the soft skin. I sighed in content, relishing in his warm touch.
"Harry?"
Both mine and Harry's gazes flashed to Niall as he spoke, a clear smirk on his face. "Should we leave or...?"
"Why?" Harry raised an eyebrow.
"Well, I mean... you and Alice--"
"It's not like they're fucking across the table, mate," Louis rolled his eyes. His gaze caught mine and he grinned. I knew that he had been counting on the blush that colored my cheeks.
"Alright, we're leaving," Harry stated. His tone had a playful air to it as he stood up and grabbed my hand, pulling me along with him before anyone could question where we were going. I heard Liam yell 'get some, Styles' and then Louis added 'have fun' but Harry merely chuckled as he led us threw his house.
I had explored most all of it, and upon doing so, I realized that it wasn't really anything interesting. Just plenty of extra rooms. I was sure that, if we wanted to, we could have a massive sleepover here and easily fit about fifty people comfortably.
Instead of going upstairs as I'd assumed, Harry led us through a maze of rooms: several lounges, two-door bathrooms, and what looked like another, smaller study, before we came to two sliding glass doors I'd never seen before. I raised an eyebrow at Harry but he merely smiled in response before pulling open the entrance.
My eyes widened as I realized what was inside. The expanse of a pool sat in front of us. It was a full-sized tub, and it was inside, thick walls and a ceiling guarding it from the chilly weather. The fact that Harry had an indoor pool was one thing, but what really got me was the fact that it was completely dark, aside from lavender-colored candles lining nearly every surface of solid floor. The only places that remained untouched and bare led a path to the steps of the pool and around the edges of it. They illuminated the room in a soft warm glow.
