Street Youth Rising ~Septiplier~

Internal Movement

-- Mark --

That morning woke me up harshly. No blinds, no curtains, nothing to block my eyes from the sun. My face burned from the heat I was exposed to (I would surely have some sunburn to add on to my naturally tan complexion).  The roof around me was now hot with the morning sunrise. The eight minutes it took for Suns light to reach earth was enough time to make me realise that the UV rays weren't the best wake up call. Drowsy, i crawled back into my window and went to the bathroom down the hall. I felt the need to freshen myself. Why, I have no clue, but I had a feeling that lying around throwing myself a pity party would do nothing for me. So I had to make myself feel somewhat... Decent. And a slight freshening up would help me, I'm sure. 

I clicked the lights on and they flickered a moment before brightening up. I sighed as I looked to the mirror. The sight I was met with almost upset me. There was bags under my eyes (thanks to only three hours of sleep), my hair was tousled and awry, my face was sunburned and red, my eyes were lifeless and tired. I was almost a zombie. I knew I definitely looked like one. I felt like one too.

I crept back down the hall to my room. I slowly and oh so quietly went over to my wardrobe and grabbed out a pair of boxers, pants, and a tank top.

I crept back down the hall and into the bathroom. A shower was definitely in order for me. I turned on the water, tinkering with it to adjust the temperature. I like my showers scalding hot for some reason. It just felt better to me.

I stripped down to nothing and let the hot water cascade over my body as I stepped into the shower. As the water poured over me, a familiar feeling tugged at my heart:

Loneliness.

I felt memories of him wash over me. Every memory we ever had. And I remember the last time I saw him, because I had examined him closely as though I'd never see him again. His green hair which was the colour of mint (and even smelled as such on occasion). His blue eyes that reminded me of the line where the ocean meets the sky on the horizon. His pale skin that seemed to almost blend with his white tee shirt. His soft voice like the September rain.

My body grew cold and I felt the pain spread throughout me in waves. I felt the regret of leaving him. I knew he probably wasn't any better off without me, but I need to find someone to love in the meantime and he needed to do the very same. Even if it's friends with benefits, I know I'm not going to last with these withdrawals of affection - especially considering how affectionate I really am when it comes to human contact. I have to do something for myself.

Even if it meant forgetting everything. The thought shook something in me and I let out a sob of sadness. I had to forget him. His brilliant smile, his sexy laugh, his strong voice, his shimmering eyes, his pale skin, his mint hair, his soft touch, his kind expressions, his loving kisses. I had to forget everything. It sucked in my eyes. We had made something out of absolutely nothing. We had learned to find love in even the most hopeless situation. We somehow made love out of hate and that made no sense to me. We had done something so great, and here I was fucking it up by letting him go. As the tears streamed down my face and the scalding water soaked my vulnerable body, I sank to the shower floor. I had to do what it took to forget him. Even if it meant wiping him from my life entirely.

I had to forget him for now.

•••

I walked the streets in the rain, heading to the Carson Cafe. After my shower, I had decided to just to completely ruin my efforts for cleanliness and warmth by stepping out of the comfort of my house into the pouring rain - and it was all because I wanted a fucking cup of coffee. My hoodie was hugged tightly to my body as though that would prevent me from getting wet. My hood was up and my headphones blasted out music. I could somehow manage to hear my thoughts over Everything Black ( which happened to be by one of my favourite artists, Unlike Pluto) and the rain that heavily pounded every surface in its way. I wished I would just melt along with the rain so I didn't have to face life anymore, but I knew my wishes wouldn't be granted.