Isolated. {Lams}

Chapter Seventeen

John Pov
I sat on my bed, Alex by my side, both of us quickly trying to make candles from hair grease and baby oil.

"Where'd you even get this stuff?" I asked Alex.

"I have my ways," He replied, his eyes focused on his candle.

Or..
soon to be candle I suppose.

"What do you think your gonna do once we escape?" I asked.

He looked up from his candle.
"I...I don't know." He said, staring blankly forward.

I put my hand in his and rubbed his knuckles slowly. He looked down at our hands and sighed.

"Am I kidding myself?" He asked. "What?" I said, slightly taken back.

Out of all things..
he said that.

"Is there actually something..here? Between us? Or should I just give up?" He asked.

"Of course there is!"
I exclaimed.

He looked and me and sighed.
"I sure hope so." He muttered.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked.

"I want there to be something between us. Something special, you know? But..
I just have that feeling that...
you don't think or..
want the same thing."
He said, letting go of my hand and working on his candle again.

"Alex,"
He didn't look up.

"Alex, listen to me."

He sighed heavily and looked up at me.
"What?" He heaved.

"I do care about you alright? I just have really awful communication skills but I do assure you, I'm trying."

He clenched his jaw.
"You mean that?" He asked quietly. "Mhm."

He smiled softly and looked back to his candle.

"When we escape,"
"If." Alex interrupted.

"When we escape do you want to...like...live together or somethin?" I asked, trying not to be awkward but quite obviously failing.

"Yeah of course."
He replied.

Oh thank god.

It would've been some weird awkward fuck if he said no.

"Nice."
I said quietly.

It was quiet for a few minutes.
I cleared my throat.

"So..what do you want to use for contraband?" I asked.

"I think alcohol will do nicely."
He replied.

I fucking hate alcohol.
Especially after it landed me here.
But if it's going to help me out..,
then it's worth it.

"How are you going to get it?" I asked. "I have my ways." He replied.

"That scares me a little bit but alright." I muttered.
He chuckled, shaking his head.

And then he was looking in my eyes. And I was looking in his.
And then it happened for the second time.

We kissed for the second time.

He brought his hand to my neck and somehow we managed to get closer.
I moved my hands to his back and brought his chest to mine.

After a few more amazing seconds the two of us pulled away, panting softly.

"John, will you be my boyfriend?" He asked.

"What?!" I exclaimed standing up.

"I'm so sorry! I mean- I didn't mean- I-" He exclaimed, also standing up.

"No, no I mean like.." I trailed off.

He stared at me with wide, scared eyes. Aw shit I've scared the fuck out of the poor kid.

I pulled him close, listening his fast frantic breath.

"W-what are you doing?" He asked.

I leaned down slightly and kissed him again.
When we pulled away, he stumbled back to the bed.

"..D-Did that count as a yes?" He asked. "Mhm." I hummed, waltzing back to him.

I heard him let out a relived breath as I wrapped arm around his shoulders.

"Thank god,"
He breathed. his shoulder relaxing slightly.

"Just don't tell anyone." I said, taking my hand off him and restarting on my candle.

I don't know how Alex is making his so fucking well.
But I'm going to figure out how to do it myself.

"Or they'll beat us up. Right? Jeez I want to get out fucking prison so bad." He said.

"If you could live any where..where would it be?" I asked.

He thought for a moment.

"Somewhere where being gay isn't a bad thing.
I mean..
it's not a bad thing now..
But like...
Where people aren't hated despite their race, religion or sexuality.
That, is where I'd want to live."
He said, working on his candle.

I sighed and muttered,
"I'd like to live there too."

He smiled.
"Let's live there together then. Create a world and erase the shitty one we live one." Alex said.

I grinned along with him.
"Sounds great."