Ninjas of Love

Where's The Yang Sauce?

Emily walked over to the bookcase, which stretched from floor to ceiling, and pulled out a book entitled "The Beckoning" from the very top shelf. She opened it up to page two hundred and thirty four and immediately dropped to the book onto Blake's soft blanket in utter disgust at the lewd and sexual content contained within, before politely placing it back into its niche on the cedar-wood bookshelf and pulling out a much safer looking book, entitled The Guide To Faunus Cookery. She took it in her non-cane-using hand and navigated her way to the cracked, red sofa that Ruby had also plonked her bottom upon. Before opening the piece of leather-bound gastronomic literature, she removed the tight, black, cowhide boots from her short, yet abnormally wide, feet and tossed them aside by the door to the rest of the academy.

Whilst she did this, Ruby had rolled up two cigarettes; in a somewhat surprisingly move on her part, they were simply tobacco and not wacky in any form. She placed one between her teeth while her sister wasn't looking and tapped on Emily's knee to get her attention. This simple touch sent a wave of excruciating pain rifling through Emily's patella deep into her defective attempt at a quadriceps tendon, causing her to snap her head straight toward the young, ombré-haired hopeful huntress- who pushed the roll-up cigarette towards the crippled teen in an attempt to non-verbally offer it to her. Emily took it in between the proximal phalanxes of her index and middle finger, before Ruby placed a lit lighter at the ends of both cigarettes to light them.

Emily brought it up to her mouth and took a drag, as she opened the book up, for no particular reason and through no particular logic, to page three hundred and seventy five (which was still fewer than a third of the way through the book, which was very nearly a cube. As if by magic, she felt her heartbeat slow to a regular resting rate, and felt her knees succumb to numbness, thus providing her with the first real pain relief she'd had since falling down the hill a mere twelve hours ago on her journey to Beacon Academy. She welcomed this, and thus took another, much larger drag as she read about the very traditional, and slightly disturbing, methods used in a place called Menagerie to make their classic dish of Cheese Pie. While she did this, Billy was knelt over the coffee table, with bits of scroll everywhere, digging inside the machine to find any part that he could upgrade to maximise the performance of it, and Charlie was holed up in the bedroom area of the dorm- having elected to make a start on the book that, he reckoned, the two members of Team RWBY who'd bought him it would force him to work through, despite its penchant for both long-winded explanations of simple subjects and overwhelmingly obnoxious verbosity when it was, quite frankly, unnecessary. And Kerian? Well, he was passed out on the floor drunk, behind the sofa Emily and Ruby were smoking on.
Emily finished her cigarette, and dropped the still smouldering butt behind her onto Kerian's back as Yang turned around to speak to her pals. "So, what we have for dinner, guys, is a favourite of mine. It's a- RUBY PUT THAT DOWN OR SO HELP ME, GOD, I WILL RAM THAT SCYTHE UP YOUR ARSE!" Yang said, figuratively exploding as Ruby hectically stubbed out the remaining quarter of a cigarette she had on the blotchy, half-pulled-off leather arm of the sofa. "Ok, now that's all sorted, go through the door next to the fridge to the dining room and we can eat this all together."

Six of her seven teammates and pseudo-teammates did as she asked; all of them save for Emily. She toddled over to Yang, and lovingly pecked her on the cheek before taking three plates of the food she had prepared, to take through to the waiting diners.