Ninjas of Love

NOL-laig Shona!

A/N: Right, so as you are probably aware- unless you live under a rock or something of that ilk, it is Christmas. The following chapter, NOL-laig Shona!, is designed as a pseudo-Christmas special for Ninjas Of Love and, as such, is not- and should not be interpreted as- a canonical part of the book's storyline, and rather should be seen for what it is, a non-canonical oneshot-type chapter as a Christmas present to all two of you who read this. I love you, and merry Christmas!

The bedroom was dark and silent, save for the wind whistling its breathy, signature tune in through the window, which had been left ajar by whomever had been the last to get to bed the night before. Inside the room, three hunters- and their three huntress friends, along with Weiss- were asleep, visions of goodness-only-knows dancing around their heads. You, dear reader, may have noticed (if you are of a mathematical disposition) that three plus three plus one does not account for both Team RWBY and Team BECK. Alas, it is true that seven students lay tucked up in their bunks, as one Miss Ruby Rose excitedly checked the time on her scroll.

The screen of the device lit up her corner of the room with a distinctive blue light which stung Ruby's eyes. As they slowly became accustomed to the overwhelming brightness, they picked out four numbers, in angry red on a background of darkest, emptiest black. 04:55. Perfect, Ruby thought to herself, her hands involuntarily rubbing up against one another as if she were some kind of comic book villain, I can wake everyone up and get Christmas underway. And- and this is the master part (Ruby, you genius)- Yang can't even complain it isn't morning. Because, guess what, sis, it is! Very early morning, but it's morning! On Christmas Day!

Ruby jumped out of bed so quickly that she left a small pile of blood-red petals on the bed. Why? Semblances. Honestly, that's as good an explanation as I have so it'll have to do. With a leap and a bound, she traversed the dormitory, finding the light switch with all the ease of isolating, and using, the Higgs Boson particle in a practical way. Flicking the switch with her stubby, fleshy finger, she made sure to wake her colleagues by simultaneously submerging the entire dormitory in the ochre light of the old lightbulb and letting out an almighty, almost Fus Ro Dah-like scream of "It's Christmas, guys!".

As she assaulted their senses with all of her usual subtlety, the other residents of Ruby's apartment stirred- with varying degrees of happiness at being woken up by Miss Rose. These ranged from Kerian's unexcited, yet wistful "I guess it's time to day drink", all the way to Weiss' tactic of pulling the sheets over her head and mumbling something about Ruby's rectum and a halberd.

Eventually, the octet managed to semi-sleepwalk their way into the living room, where the usual seating arrangement had been eschewed in favour of a semi-circle around the Christmas tree. Ruby was the first to look at the tree, and was therefore the first of her friendship circle to notice the new additions to the room, that sat underneath the tree, in amongst the myriad dropped needles that had fallen from the Atlesian tree. Eight bags. One scarlet-red. One snow-white. One jet-black. One golden-yellow. One mauve. One Campo Viejo-crimson. One sea-blue. Last, and quite frankly least, one a burnt orange. "Guys! Santa's been!" Ruby yelled excitedly, clearly thinking that the necessity of inside voices disappeared on Christmas Day and drawing a harsh shush from a sleep-deprived Charlie who had just been awoken before five in the morning.

"Can we open the presents now?" Ruby asked, every word coming out of her mouth at the pace of a Japanese bullet train so that each word crashed into each other like Ruby had been talking Atlesian. With a sigh, Weiss simply let out a defeated "yes" as she sat down on the old, red, leather sofa.

Inside every bag was three gifts left by Santa Claus (who was, unbeknownst to even the heiress herself, Weiss' great-uncle Shiro Schnee), and Ruby elected to open hers first. She had received a t-shirt bearing the logo of heavy metal band Ënginëbrain, a palette of dust, and a box of Patchian chocolate called Cadbury's Roses.