Brotherly love (phan)

IMPORTANT NOTICES

IF YOU CARE ABOUT ME AS A PERSON THEN PLEASE READ THIS.

Okay guys, if you read my last authors note you probably noticed that I'm not doing exactly great. I mean, I really should be sleeping now as I am exhausted, but I am too churned up and need to fucking do this for myself or else I will not get better and put it off and just go back to crying. So here it is.

Brotherly love is going on haitus.

There, I said it.

I should have said it a week ago probably, but I didn't, and now it has ended up in me crying a lot too frequently.

This last chapter has been horrible. I have been suffering from block and that caused me stress. I had to write smut which caused me stress about putting it on tumblr so everyone could be happy (which went tits up but carrying on, I will say more on this in a bit). I had to do a lot of stuff for this chapter. And pretty much all of it caused me a shit ton of stress.

When I was determined to update this chapter yesterday my friend told me not to push myself as she knew I was having problems, and I did. Because I'm an idiot who prioritises the wrong things.

I stayed up until around 1am finishing writing the end, editing the 16000 words, fixing it on my tumblr and then censoring it on wattpad and trying to link it up then.

I got it up at 2am.

Not healthy.

And then the links didn't work and people couldn't find it and I just wanted to sleep but I was trying to sort it for you guys.

The stuff I do for you is extortionate sometimes.

Then I woke up this morning and went through some comments, deleted some comments and then ended up crying in my room as the links still weren't working and I had done so much to try and make you guys happy.

I felt shirt through the day and then due to really annoying circumstances I burst into tears again tonight.

You know (probably) that my family found out I write fanfiction? Well my brother decided to try looking for it, and I had told him I didn't want to read it or try and find it a million times.

My friends luckily found out (which I am grateful for) and stopped him but not before I was crying and shaking and just wanting to delete this story. I mean, this isn't the first breakdown I have had over it *war flashbacks to chapter 16 and most of 20-23*

I have been trying so desperately to be a sunshine to you guys that I am turning into a storm cloud.

So I am not even going to apologise for this, because why the fuck should I?

I need to start putting myself first, so that's what I'm gonna do. Bro lo is on a break.

My health and sanity comes first over this story. And it's not like I'm leaving it on a cliffhanger or anything so it could be worse.

I don't even know how long this haitus will last, it could only be a week or two, but until then no more of this story will be coming your way. I will probably add onto this or delete or do something when I am off haitus so you guys know I am good again. But I'll work that out later.

It's not like I'm gonna not go on wattpad, I have stories to read and really lovely people to talk to (*coughlanarikercough*), I just won't be writing. Simple as.

And if any one complains so help me I will actually slap them into hell where I will become queen of (because I re-read some of the chapters I wrote [like 17 until 23] and yeah I am definitely going to hell) and kick them a lot.

For once, this is me first.

Okay, so that's finally given me some relief, I hope you guys understand the reasons of this and I hope you all survive which you will until I come back.

And feel free to come and chat to me about anything because I'm not disappearing, just need a break.

Love you guys <3

MORE OTHER, SLIGHTLY LESS IMPORTANT, NOTICES YOU MIGHT CARE ABOUT??? I dont know man you decide

Okay I am going to summer in the city by the way. I haven't said anything BUT HELL YEAH I'M GOING! So if anyone sees me come say hi to me :) I won't bite and will probably hug you to death for reading my stories :3

But like the day after that for roughly the next two weeks I will have no wifi or signal so actually will be dropping off the face of the earth as I am on this residential thing AND I AM GOING TO MISS SO MUCH LIKE WHAT IF PHAN COMES OUT, WHAT ABOUT THE ANIMES I AM KEEPING UP WITH (THERE ARE 4 AND SO HELP ME ZENA AND MEI IF YOU TELL

ME ANYTHING ABOUT FREE! I WILL SLAY YOU) AND I DON'T KNOW ANYONE WHO WILL BE THERE AND I WILL PROBABLY FALL DOWN A HILL AND DIE.

Touch wood I don't.

So yeah, from the 11th (I think? The Monday of that weekish) I will be in hell for the next two weeks.

Oh and then I get my exam results too ooh yay (wish me luck)

So yeah, hectic end for the holidays for me before I'm off to sixth form.

But anyway I hope you guys have some fun while I'm gone, read some good stuff and stay happy.

Be sunshines and shine on through stormy weather.

I really do love you all <3

Anni out!

Chu xx