Soulless (Book #2 of Hunted)

Doesn't Exist

Keegan's hand was suddenly on my shoulder and before I could even think of jerking away from him, he gave my shoulder a squeeze and then let go. It was almost as if he were trying to reassure me or something.

"You have to know that the more you feed the beast, the stronger it gets. He won't be the person you fell in love with when we're done," Keegan said slowly. I think somewhere inside my brain I knew that. That must have been why Zane tried so hard to stop. He didn't want to lose himself. I felt the tears burning in my throat again and I tried to push them back down, but it really hurt. I would have to remind myself later to just sit in the shower and have a good cry.

This was too big of a decision for one person to make. I hated the fact that Zane was in such excruciating pain, but I didn't want to give all my effort in the attempt to make him better just to be stuck with Sir Anton the Douchebag. There was just no winning for me.

"You don't need to think so hard about it, Lorelei," Keegan mumbled looking down at the counter top. I glanced at him angrily and he shook his head with a smile. "That guy you're trying to get back...he never really existed in the first place." That nearly pushed me over the edge.

"Wh-what do you mean?" I asked my eyes stinging. He sighed and covered his face with his hands.

"I mean, 'Zane' is a persona created by a group of self-righteous witches who thought they were doing the right thing. I've known Anton since he was five years old and he had sensitive moments sometimes, sure, but overall...that boy is a monster, through and through."

I shook my head. I didn't want to hear this. Zane was real! He was in there somewhere, I knew it! If he wasn't real, I would be dead right now! I would've drowned along with my parents four years ago...What if he only saved me because he wanted me? Not as a friend, but as a toy? A blood bag to suck on at his leisure? No! It couldn't be true! That couldn't be right! The only way to break the hex that Clay's family put on Zane was if he drained someone he loved with all his heart. He loved me! Zane loved me!

"I have a really bad idea," Phoebe suddenly said raising her hand into the air. Keegan and I looked at her and I hastily wiped a tear from my cheek. She smiled nervously and bit down on her bottom lip. We stared at her expectantly and she finally said, "Can't we just get the hex or curse or whatever from Clay or something and then we could just—"

"No!" Keegan said before Phoebe could finish. I saw his fingernails dig into the granite counter-top and his jaw clenched as he stood. "No," he repeated shaking his head. "That would be just as bad as keeping him chained up for good." It hurt to think of Zane imprisoned for eternity, but if we didn't curse him again I would never get Zane back so it wouldn't really matter anyway.

"I have to get him back, Keegan," I whispered. He stared at me for a moment and I swear I could see something like fear in his eyes. I stared back with as much intensity as I could manage and the same fear painted my face. It was the fear of losing him. Keegan needed Anton and I needed Zane and only one of us could get what we wanted.

"You can't make a vampire feel human emotion," he said slowly, his green eyes burning like icy emeralds into my retinas. "Every emotion is heightened when you become a vampire and that's why we shut it off. You can't live as a vampire and feel like a human. It doesn't work. He is living proof of that." His words resonated in my brain as his eyes did their weird whammy on me. I knew he was trying to plant the idea in my mind and it was working, not just because he was so good at manipulation, but because it was true. Zane was torn apart by guilt after feeding even when he didn't kill the victim. A vampire couldn't keep up a healthy diet and care at the same time. It just...didn't...work. I nodded dazedly and he smiled.