wild heart. bws

IX

Brad was amazing.

It's even a week since the concert and our hook up. And let me tell you, it has been one of the best weeks I ever got to experience. Not just the sex, we are friends, we lie in bed for most of the time and make music together.

Even though I don't really know if we are friends, we didn't need labels. It was just me and him and we had a really really good time. If we labelled it, we would complicate things. Like anniversaries, dates and stuff.

Nobody knows, nobody needed to know. We are two adults having fun, nothing else.

"Baby, come back! It's cold here." Brad was laying naked in my bed while I was getting prepared for the day. It was so hard to resist.

"You know I can't, I have to go home. And don't call me Baby, it makes me cringe."

"Oh come on, you know you like it really." He was now standing up and walking forward to me. Oh no don't, please let me go. He knew I didn't need much begging to come back.

But instead of giving up, I ran out of his hotel room.

I got into my car and drove to Mullingar. It was my fathers birthday and my mother was throwing a big party. Everyone was there and that means I have to see Niall. Since our fall out we haven't spoken even one word. And that will continue until he decides to say sorry to me.

It didn't matter if we was right, he had no right talking to me like that, I hope he understood.

Not that it was easy not talking to him, I really missed him, but if he had a problem he could've always come talk to me, not telling me in an argument.

However, now I was at home, greeted by my mother and my father. I wished him happy birthday and went into the garden behind my house where the party was taking place. Because it was early nobody was there yet but soon our whole family came.

My aunt Helena with her three children, spoiled kids let me tell you. My aunt and her husband always brought them everything, so no wonder their children are rude.

Next my creepy uncle came, Patrick, 49, unmarried and without children.

By the time everyone was here, it was loud and crowded. It was an Irish birthday party, what did I expect. Not that I don't like Irish parties, I just don't like our family gatherings. Everyone was asking me what I was doing with my time, when I would forget this music nonsense and go to a nice university to make my father proud. It was always the same, music is no job for them. At some point I did think about enrolling in a university to study music, but somehow it felt wrong. Now it looks like I do nothing at all and just spend my fathers money on toys like DJ equipment.

It was easier for Niall, he made himself a name, I was only his little sister.

"...you know I met a really nice lady last weekend and I think I'm gonna ask her to marry me. She is the most gorgeous woman..." my uncle said, to be honest I wasn't really paying attention, he was just creepy and boring.

"Hey Stella, can we talk?" Thank god. Someone was liberating me from Patrick. Oh no never mind, it was my brother.

"As you wish..."

He was leading me towards our house so that we could talk in silence.

"Look, I am sorry for yelling at you and say those mean things. I don't even have an excuse, only that I am the worst brother..."

"You know that is not the problem, do you? I am mad at you because I had to be told in this way, this words don't come from nowhere, you did mean it, if you had those thoughts, why didn't you tell me that you didn't approve of the way I handle my problems? Not that it would have changed anything, but I would know what my brothers impression of me was. Well, at least I know now that you basically think I am a stone cold bitch."

"Stella, do you even listen yourself? That is not what I said, I know that you are strong! It's just that I also know when you are lying. For christ sake, you had a heart attack and you act as if nothing happened!"

"When I act like it never happened, it isn't real ok? I don't want it to be real, I don't want to be sick!" I couldn't stop the tears running down my cheek.

I didn't want Niall to see me cry, so I ran away.

I climbed in my car and drove to the person that didn't know me well enough to question my behavior.

I drove to Brad.