Vlog Squad Imagines

~Help~ Tom Harlock

WARNING: THIS IMAGINE CONTAINS THE TOPIC OF DEPRESSION AND SOME SUICIDE. VIEWER DISCRETION ADVISED.

Dedicated to Alissa, hope you like it hun<3

Tom's POV

It felt as though it had been weeks since I heard from my best friend, Y/N. She usually was the life of the party, constantly in contact with me, and such a fun joy to be around. But recently I had noticed her drifting away from not only our friends, but me as well. She never answered her phone or text back when I would send her funny memes, and I began to worry about her. This wasn't like the loving, pretty, goofy girl I had known for years and had fallen in love with.

I had never admitted that to anyone, but I was deeply and madly in love with Y/N. The way her eyes sparkled as she discussed her interests, or the way her mouth would curve upwards when she found one of my stupid jokes funny. Or how if you got her to laugh so hard, she would sometimes snort, which embarrassed her a lot, but little did she know how adorable she was.

I couldn't take the silence anymore, so I left the party I was at, one she had been invited to, and rushed to her apartment. I knocked on the door, two minutes went by without an answer. I knew she was home because I could hear the light murmur of the television playing, and she always would turn her TV off if she left. I pounded on the door, making my knocks louder so she could hear me. Still nothing, no one.

"Y/N, it's Tom. Please, open the door." The sound shut off, and the patter of light footsteps was heard. The shuffled from the living room to the front door, but stopped.

"Go away." She barked. I was taken by surprise, Y/N always wanted to see me. Why was she avoiding me.

"I am not leaving until you talk to me. You haven't spoken to me in almost two weeks. I have been constantly texting you, Y/N."

"Take a hint, I don't want to talk." She snapped.

"Y/N, please this isn't like you. I am really concerned." There was silence on the other side, but soon I heard the door being unlocked. She cracked the door a little, and I could see inside her apartment that it was dark and kind of messy. I walked in, and my heart sank immediately once I saw her.

Her cheeks had tear stains on them, her hair was thrown up in a lazy bun and she was wearing the baggiest clothes that you couldn't make out her body. This wasn't like my best friend. Not my Y/N.

"What is it? What's wrong? Who do I have to beat up?" She looked away, back at the paused TV. I could see new tears forming in her eyes. I quickly pulled her into me, holding onto her tightly. I wanted to protect her from all the evil in the world.

"Y/N, tell me who hurt you." She took a deep breath before muttering two words that made me break even more.

"I did." She whispered. I pulled back so I could look into her y/e/c/ eyes. I sat next to her on the couch as she began to explain everything.

Apparently she had been diagnosed with major depression when she was younger, and she never told me because she was terrified I would run away and leave her. I couldn't think straight, I ran out of the apartment while I screamed, "Don't move. I will be back, promise!"

Twenty five minutes later, I was at her door again. Thankfully she left the door unlocked, but she wasn't on the couch. I heard her tears coming from the bathroom. I ran there and found her pouring pills into her hand.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I yelled as I knocked the pills out of her hand.

"WHY DID YOU DO THAT?! JUST LET ME DO THIS. EVEN YOU DON'T WANT TO HANDLE ME." She was coughing now due to how hard she was crying. I pulled her in for a hug again, but she ripped away.

"Why did you leave me? I told you that you would leave." She pushed her way passed me, but stopped once she got into the hallway. She stared at what I had thrown on the ground. A meal from her favorite fast food place, her favorite candy, her favorite movie, fuzzy socks, a teddy bear and a fuzzy blanket.

"I went to get some of your favorite things. I would never ever leave you." She grabbed hold of my torso and pulled our bodies close as she buried her head into my chest. I brushed her hair with my hand as she thanked me.

"You are my best friend, Y/N. I will always be here for you." I whispered in her ear and then kissed her forehead. I decided on not telling her that I loved her more than a friend, not because I didn't want to get involved with her anymore, that was far from how I felt. I didn't tell her because I love her, and I want her to love herself first. She was the most important person in my life and I didn't want her to get confused or distracted from loving herself by trying to focus on making me happy. Laying on the couch with her in my arms as she laughed at her favorite comedy and ate her favorite foods, this is what makes me happy. Seeing her happy and alive makes me happy, and I would do anything to make sure that she stayed like this forever.

I knew she would have some down days, but I made her promise to tell me when she was feeling down and I would drop whatever I was doing to go watch movies with her and do whatever she wanted.

A/N: Hi, if ANY of my readers have depression or anxiety or ANY mental illness and needs a friend, please message me. I, myself, have depression and anxiety and I want everyone to know a few things:

1) Whatever anyone says, it is not just in your head and it is a very important thing.

2) You aren't a bother or dramatic

and 3) YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!!!!!!

love, mrsomalley13