what led to us

chapter thirteen

[a week before you met]

you were there. in the seat. jae by your side. the sounds of a million voices running through your head and the building around you. the chair you sat in as uncomfortable as the tension in the room. the man sat in front of you both. jae was holding your hand, his thumb grazing across your knuckles every so often. yet it wasn't helping. you wanted to pull away, hide into a ball. you couldn't believe this was happening. what you'd just heard from the man in front of you.

your mind was spinning. trying to process the words you'd just been told. jae sat staring at you, watching you as if you were about to explode. letting go of your hand as if you were a time bomb about to go off. yet you felt like you were. the truth was just that. no one in the room knowing what to say next, the silence a heavy weight on your throat. holding your stomach as if the growing ball of pain inside of you could just go away. if only you could get rid of it. find a way to make sense of the news you'd just received.

this was impossible. how. how had this happened. jae was sat motionless, guilt riddled on his face. he too not understanding the sounds that had intricately pulled appart your life, his life. you could feel the sadness radiating off of him. he couldn't look you in the eyes. you were staring at him now. still wondering what to say next.

you couldn't cry. if you cried that only meant that you had excepted the fate that was given to you. not as a gift. a punishment. you thought of all the ways you could have stopped this, yet there was nothing you could've done. you were doomed from the start.

the doctor in front of you still sat in empathetic silence. with nothing left to say he got up leaving the room that your hollow body sat in. jae sat with his body hanging between his knees. you could hear his sobs.

then came yours.