THE ROSE AND THE THORN

Chapter 37

RUBY'S POV

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She sat with a hardened expression on her face, refusing to meet my eyes. My heart broke for her, knowing that what she had just seen would've ruined her, but it had to happen. It had to.

I couldn't be with her. It was dangerous, it was wrong, and I was only holding her back from living a life she didn't have to keep hidden. Seeing how easily Connor and Scott found out about us proved just how dangerous this was. Over the weekend, Maria has made one last ditch effort to get me back, and I had agreed. I didn't love her, I've realised now that I don't think I ever did, but I had to move on from India. I was going to destroy her, and it was better to do it now than in the future.

She sat silently as tears made their way down her cheeks. She didn't move, she didn't make a sound, but the tears kept coming. After what felt like hours, I finally managed to speak.

"I'm sorry..." was all I managed to say, but it was enough to provoke an action from her.

She stood up, grabbed her bag and walked towards the door. I reached out to grab her wrist, but she snatched it away as if I had burned her.

"Don't touch me,"

Her voice was emotionless, flat, empty. I would've preferred for her to scream, to hit me, swear at me. Anything. Anything would've been better than the emptiness that fell from her lips.

I watched as she disappeared out the door and walked to the school gates, leaving the property. I didn't blame her, I expected her to, but I didn't want her to be alone. I didn't want her to do something she would regret.

I considered chasing after her, but I knew it would be a bad idea. Instead, I made my way to the quadrangle where India and her friends sat to eat lunch. Scott and Connor smirked as they saw me approaching, but their smiles quickly turned to looks of worry when I got closer. It wasn't until then that I realised that I was crying too.

"Please, go to India's house. Now. Please!" I begged.

They didn't say a word, instead quickly grabbing their bags and running off to the school gates, their unfinished lunches sitting pathetically on the pavement. I picked everything up, putting it in the bin and walking slowly back to my classroom.

This is what heartbreak felt like. I had never known it until now, and I had done it to myself. I didn't want to hurt India, god no, I never wanted to, but I had to. I remembered what it was like to be eighteen, to be young, in my final year of high school and experiencing the excitement of clubbing, sex and everything else that came along with it. India wasn't going to have that, because of me.

Because of me she would have to hide, because of me she wouldn't get herself out there and potentially meet her soulmate. But what if I was her soulmate? Honestly, it truly felt that way. The way we connected, the way we made love, the way we just fit together like two puzzle pieces, like a key in a lock, like two halves of the same heart.

I loved her. I did. I was in love with her, which is why I had to do this. My decision was made quickly and without as much thought as I would've liked, but I felt like it was the right one. I still hadn't told Kelsey, and I knew she would murder me if she found out that I had not only ended things with India, but gone back to Maria. I had to brace myself for that.

There were things at India's house that I needed to collect. I hadn't thought of that, but I knew I wouldn't be seeing those things anytime soon.

Sitting in my chair at my desk I lay my head in my hands, letting the first tear slowly fall. How could I have let this happen? How could I have possibly thought that being with a student was possible? She was so different, everything about her was so intriguing and so...perfect.

The way her brown hair fell over her shoulders and down to her waist. The way her skin was perfect, even without makeup. The way her eyebrows were perfectly shaped without her even trying, the way her eyelashes were thick and dark and so incredibly long. The way her blue eyes gazed into mine before she would lean in to kiss me.

She was so fucking perfect, but she couldn't be mine. I thought back to the time we first had sex. It was pure lust, but it was incredible. I could be myself around her, especially during sex. With Maria I had to hold back, she didn't like being kinky, in fact she hated it, but I know India loved it.

We were the perfect match, but we weren't at the same time. If only we had met at different times in our lives, everything would've been different. If only she had gone to a different school, if only life was different.

The thought of going home to Maria made me cringe. I wasn't thinking when I said I would go back to her. The thought of having sex with her made me shudder in disgust. I didn't want to touch anyone except India. I wanted to touch her all over, any time I wanted to.

I just hoped that someday she would forgive me, and she would understand why I did what I did. I didn't think she was in love with me like I was with her, but I knew feelings were there. I already missed her.

I didn't have any classes after lunch, so I packed up my things and drove to Kelsey's house, hoping that somehow she would tell me that I had made the right decision.