The Comedians Mask -Undertale *Discontinued For Now*

Chapter 19- Visions of the Past

He eventually got up out of the shower, still trembling with pure emotion. The clock read 10:52 as his whole body was convulsing involuntarily, it was a struggle to breathe even breaths. Guess that's what you get for shutting it off for so long... Sitting on the side of the cool bathtub he rested his skull in his skeletal hands , glancing at his bare forearms again... no marks yet huh? He should be proud of himself, yet he couldn't help but feel an even stronger urge. They burned for that attention, but instead he ignored it, and began to evaluate. When did he begin to get this bad again? There hasn't been a genocide run for a few resets now... he should be happy, or relived. Papyrus was okay. What was triggering this? All he knew was that the urges and thoughts were back and he couldn't do that to Papyrus again ,that was it, he just needed to talk to someone. It could end up not even mattering as it all resets again, but maybe it could help to just be honest with someone. That evening Sans had decided to visit Grillby again. He couldn't continue like this. He was going to come clean to someone.
He was still trembling as he left his home. His legs felt barely capable of supporting him, buckling at the knees with every step , the exhaustion taking over him. His head was screaming that this was an awful idea, that Grillby would abandon him like everyone else. Past experience has taught him well. But he continued.

Opening the wooden door to the cosy establishment and hearing that slight tinkle of the bell already mad him feel a little better. Grillby just seemed to glance up , slightly shocked.

"grillby i-i need to come clean. I'm not okay. At all. What you were saying the other night was spot on , I'm S-struggling with alot of things and I'm worried I might not make it out unscathed. I just need you to lis-ten, I need to get some s-stuff off my chest... I'm practically the tearing myself apart. he wasn't what he seemed , my father, you knew about some things but you didn't have any idea... I was a captive in my own home, he tired to enhance and weaponize my magic, experimenting on me. He thought that if he could brake a monster that their true abilities would come out. He tried to make me desperate so the primal instincts would kick in. he tried starving me for days at a time, depriving me of sleep, physical pain... he thought that if I was desperate or determined enough that I would snap as the adrenalin kicked in, enhancing my strength.
one experiment left me partially blind... you haven't seen my eyes have you..."

Suddenly I bright blue ring with yellow highlights surrounded his left pupil while the other stayed blank, empty and dark. Grillby barely even glanced at them and went back to cleaning. Sans just kept unloading.

"I just ended up weaker than any other monster in the underground and fucked up. I know that all of what I'm saying probably doesn't matter because you'll just forg-"

"SANS! Why are you saying all this. I knew your father well, he wouldn't harm a fly so why you are formulating all this, I have no idea ! Is this your pathetic way to get me to feel sorry for you ? To pretend you were abused by daddy!? I have my own problems, I'm not just here for you! I'm not just here to talk about your problems ! You don't pay me to be your damn therapist, so why don't you shut the Fuck up and go find someone who gives a shit! Go ahead an do something about it, I've had enough of listening to you cry about your self created problems! "

When Grillby had finally turned to face the skeleton a look of pure hatred painted his face. His eyes burning deep into Sans' soul as it formed yet another crack. Sans muttered something about being sorry, pure agony filling his voice . Trust shattered....the one person he though would care enough to help support him had shown his true feelings again. Within a flash of blinding blue light Sans found himself in the forest yet again, a blizzard forming as he just lay and sobbed in the snow...

Until he woke up in the shower yet again, the clock still showing 10:52.