Picking up the Pieces

7

Bella....come back.... Please baby, come back to me...I miss you so much, baby.... please come back.....

It was all he could whisper in his sleep. All he could think. His heart bled. He held on to the only picture of Isabella he had. She had burnt all the other pictures at home.

It's been two years... he has not moved on yet......

(Alistair)

I had walked in to an empty house the next day after the confrontation. Sally and I had a fight. How dare she call Bella that? I had mentioned Bella to her once, I told her she lived with me, that she cooked so well, my little Belle, she kept the house and made it home. I did not want to tell Sally of all people I was engaged to her. Hell she was under aged for heaven sake. Sally twisted my words so bad, I was just stunned

I had taken her out to buy some school stuff she needed. I had wanted her to go with Paul, my chauffer, but one look at her face, I could see she was holding back tears, she has been so attached to me her entire life and I upped and started avoiding her....

I was there when she was born, I was there for her first school, I was there to keep her tooth under her pillow for the tooth fairy...I was also there when her parents passed.... she grew up in front of me...

"I would marry you some day" she would quip... I would just hold her and laugh...

Oh how I wish she knew...I loved her more every day, but I stayed away. I was a self appointed guardian, She was just a kid and she would have boys in her life later and she would not need me anymore...

Just the thought would make me want to break something.

She was so beautiful, innocent. I had seen how broken she was when her parents died. I did not want to show that I cared because I know my mother. I know she never liked Bella, She looks at everything from business point and Bella did not make business sense...

She was the one who introduced me to Sally.

I just wanted to take care of her...After her parents died; I wanted to be responsible for her. Dad was elated but mother would not let it go. She would always find ways to do send her away. Suddenly Father wanted me to get engaged to her. I was shocked to say the least but the reason he gave was reasonable, it would give me time to make a better life for her. So I said yes.

The kiss that night... I could not describe it. My Little Bella, waited for me, she looked so cute hovering over the food, warming it up. I was supposed to care for her, but she took care of me.

I had gone to see what was cooking, she shivered. I thought she had caught cold, but when I turned her around... her eyes.... God I could drown in those beautiful blue orbs. She opened her mouth to say something, I just kissed her. She melted into my arms as if that was the only place she belonged. Oh god I wanted her so bad....

No.... I couldn't, she is my responsibility, I cannot take advantage of a girl who was under my protection. I was too old for her; I was not the right person. I pushed her away,

"This should not have happened.... I am so sorry Bella...I am so sorry"

I started to avoid her. I wanted her to be a little away, so when I let her go, she would not hurt as much. It took me so much effort to keep myself away from her, when all I wanted to do was hug her, kiss her till she melted into me. It was driving me insane.

I would walk in quietly to look at her sleep... my angel...

Sally was just a friend; we hung out a few times. She tried to come close to me, but I never let her. That day, when she called Bella a maid, I just wanted to wring her neck. But what made me lose my mind was Bella's reaction. Did she really think I could call her a maid? May be I did not give her enough emotionally to make her think that I like her, but.... how on earth could she think I would call her a maid. She was my Bella, my little angel.

After the fight with Sally, I just walked around the park then went to a hotel. I had to think. How to make Bella see, I had to make emends, two years of showing that I didn't care, to show her that it was only a facade I had to keep up till she came of age. I could not face her that day.

I came back home, kept calling her......no answer. I ran to her room, it was empty, her things were gone. A pile of papers lied there burnt. Looking closely I saw pictures, burnt. I heart clenched...

"Bella. Where are you? come out. I am sorry, Bella please....."

I ran down, that's when something caught my eye. I saw a note, the ring, her copy of the house keys, her credit card,

The note read:

Dear Alistair,

Thank you so much for taking care of me these few years. I know I have always been a burden to you and to your family.

I am leaving the ring; it was never a real engagement for us to start with. I have seen you suffer enormously because of it. I don't want to cause you anymore pain.

Please don't search for me. I do not want to be found.

Take good care of yourself, in these days even if I was just a burden, for me you were my home. You were all I had. I love you and I always will.

Hope someday we meet and can be acquaintances.

Thank you again

Isabella

Ps: I borrowed 500$ from you. I will return them to you some day.

My hands were shaking... no... no... no...Baby......no....

I was Alistair, not Star. My chest felt like it was going to burst. I messed up. I should have told her, should have stopped her when she ran, followed her home after the fight...

So many "what ifs" Where do I find her now? Where did she go?

I slid down on the floor with head in my hands.... come back Bella Please baby.....

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It's been two years since that day. It was never the same. I worked double as hard; I have kept myself on top of the game. But I still could not get rid of the pain in the heart. I should have followed her that day.... that's my biggest regret....