True : A Hinny Fan Fiction

Chapter 24 - Lack Of Sleep

Harry knew that he would get no sleep. His stomach was tied and knotted with confusion. He hadn't stopped thinking about Ginny since their time alone after the DA meeting. He wanted to tell someone about how he was feeling, because he had so much to say and there was no way that he would tell Ron about it. Harry was asking himself again and again whether Ginny had felt it too. He wanted to ask if she had had the same butterflies parading her stomach. He wanted to ask if she was still thinking about their moment. He wanted to ask if she was asking the questions that he was. Harry searched his mind for answers, until he became simply too tired, and fell asleep.

***

When Harry woke up, he rubbed his eyes angrily and felt blindly on his side table to find his glasses. He found the cold metal on his fingers and picked it up to put on. His eyes had already adjusted to the light before he placed his glasses on, so he stood up shortly afterwards. He looked at the small calendar that his mum had got him, which ticked the days off for him. This was handy as Harry would never have remembered to constantly cross off the days. Harry smiled happily. It was a weekend. It had only seemed like a few weeks had passed, however, in reality, it had been too many for Harry to handle. 

He could only recall four of the DA lessons, however everyone else was talking about learning shield charms from him, and learning so many spells that Harry thought he had never shared with anyone. There were chunks out of weeks that he couldn't remember and didn't know where they'd gone. Harry simply thought that it was just a lack of sleep messing up his mind, due to late night revision sessions. He pulled on his grey sweatshirt, boxers, and then his black skinny jogging bottoms. He slipped on some socks and then found his black trainers. He checked his watch, to find out that he was awake very early. Harry couldn't tell why he was up so early if he went to bed so late. This didn't trouble him still, he just exited the dorm and walked down the stairs quietly. 

He opened the common room portrait door, and watched as it swung open. He then walked at a fast pace outside of the castles to the route that he usually took to visit Hagrid just outside of the Forbidden Forest. He quickened his pace into a jog, and then into a sprint. He ran to the hut, and then back to the castle. He ran to the quidditch pitch from there and when he reached the pitch, he ran back again to the castle. He ran to the great lake, and paused at the large tree. The sky was still dark, although he could see the sun breaking through. The sun was slowly pushing it's way up and out over the horizon when Harry picked himself up onto his feet and walked slowly back to the common room. It was freezing cold and as it was winter, Harry was not hot, even after running around the school in a jumper. Harry was what he might call a mild warm. 

Harry had no other reason for running than to escape his thoughts. He had been trying to figure out his feelings towards Ginny, but it was simply hopeless. He was still getting the flip in his stomach by just thinking about her. He kept imagining her hair and her smile, her laugh and her jokes. How she made Harry more than happy and how Harry wished he made her feel the same way. He was trying to think about who he might tell, but he couldn't stand to see the smug look on Hermione's face if he told her and there was no one else that he could. He knew the Neville was more awkward than him and would have no solution to his problem. He knew that Luna would just tell him stop speaking because she would be trying to focus on the nearby nargles. 

He obviously couldn't tell Ginny, because there was the minor drawback that his feelings were about her. He also couldn't tell Ron, for pure fear that Ron would not want to be his best friend anymore. He had thought about telling Hagrid for a small amount of time but decided against it when he concluded that he wanted to speak about his feelings to a friend around his age. He had even contemplated knocking on Hagrid's door when he reached Hagrid's hut but turned away and had continued running. Harry's mind searched desperately for someone that he could confide in. He thought about every single member of Dumbledore's Army, however he didn't know how much he could trust that they wouldn't share his secret.