hardzello <3

2

joe

it was a normal day for me. by 6 i was up and picking out an outfit for school, a pair of loose light wash jeans, a short sleeve pastel green button up , and a long trench coat. i always wore loose fitting clothing, as i hate anything showing how skinny i am. i sat at the table sipping black coffee with headphones in.

by 6:45 i was out the door heading to my bus stop. there were other people on my bus, but i chose not to talk to them.  conversation had always been a struggle for me. the fear of messing up and being an embarrassment overcame any want for conversation with others.

the bus arrived exactly at 6:55, when it was supposed to. i liked that the bus was on time. i had a schedule for everyday, and i never broke it.

the day was normal until science.  there are tables of two set up, most children siting at random. 

today we were being assigned lab partners.

i walked into the class like normal, sitting down in an empty seat, where no one else was sitting by me.

"everybody up!" mr.white yelled as soon as the bell rang.
"back of the room! take your things with you!" everyone moved to the back with their backpacks on.

i was confused. i didn't want to change seats. this was nerve racking, as now i would be forced to sit, and work, with someone i don't know.

"ok class, i put all your names in this bowl and im going to pick out two names at a time. you get who you get!"

this was bad. i normally sat by myself away from others. mr.white always allowed me to work alone.

"ok first up. John F. and Emma. Fred and Mary. next row, um, Jack and Roger Joe M-"

i stared at him scared about the name about to come out of his name after.

"- and Ben H."

i have heard about this ben around school.  very handsome , popular with the ladies , but never once had a girlfriend. 

ben sat down next to me. i tried to avoid eye contact, as looking at him might make him think i wanted to talk to him. i could feel his eyes on me. i wanted to walk out of the room. i HATE when people stare at me. it just makes me feel uneasy. i just wish he would sto-

"hey buddy" ben said in a low voice, as to avoid the teacher catching him talking.

"oh, u-um hi". i said in a voice shaky. why was he talking to me?  i'm a loser, he's a jock we don't mix.

"i'm ben" he looks at me with his piercing green eyes and golden blonde hair.

"i'm j-joe" i was so nervous i was stuttering.

"are you ok? looked a little sick when he called out names," ben said

"y-yeah, no i totally fine". i tried to fake smile, but i looked away not wanting him to see how bad i looked.

"are you sure you're o-"

"Mr.Hardy, would you like to share your conversation with the ready of the class?"

"no sorry, it won't happen again.".

"it better not" mr.white said. he was a nice teacher but was angry at ben for talking.

ben looked at me and lightly smiled. i looked down and saw him holding out his phone to me, with a new contact open

'if you need any help with the science' he mouthed at me. i smiled and blushed taking his phone and putting my number in.

was i beginning to like ben ? this is bad.  he's going to make fun of me for being gay.  but now i think back to it , maybe he is gay. 

i look down at his black ripped jeans a notice them cuffed a the bottom.  well that's gay.  maybe he does like me.

maybe he'll text me.

sooner or later the bell rang and we both packed up our things

"hey joe" ben said turning over to me

"yeah" i say. he is rather beautiful.

"you can also text me if you need anything"

i smile softly

"like, other than science answers"

i giggled and looked up at him.

"ok, will do, see you tomorrow ben."

"alright, bye "

we both walked out to our next class. i couldn't help but smile. i was excited to see him tomorrow