Abandoned wife

Chapter 16

First of all thank you everyone for your overwhelming response in last chapter. This story ranked 67 in Indian stories among around 7k stories. That is a big deal for me which is impossible without you guys. I hope you guys support me in future and I am able to satisfy you.

Whole night passed without a minute of sleep for Smita on the other hand he is sleeping peacefully. She wanted to sleep and forget everything but constant ache in her ass doesn't let her.

She heard chirping of birds which is indicating its dawn. She removes the blanket from her body and headed towards the washroom. She looked her reflection in mirror. Her hands has bruise of his fingers. She got hickey on the neckline area.  Her  gaze then turned to her ass and she breakdown on the floor. Her ass is turned to red and has marks of his palms. She touched that area and wanted to remove his prints on her body. She is so much angry with herself that she let this happen to herself. She on the shower and let warm water soaked her body. That area tinge but its necessary to clean the spot of past.she gently dried herself and apply an antiseptic cream to sooth & heal her wounds.
She knew she can't wear something tight it will hurt her more. She chooses a white t shirt and pink frill skirt.She wear her slippers and go down. She prepared her breakfast and take it out. She chooses the garden area to eat. The morning newspaper is placed on a table having headlines a world richest man get divorced.

"Seems like this divorce thing won't left me alone." she sighed. That man left his wife of decades for another woman. Another news is about a man killed his children and spouse in domestic violence adjoining the news of married woman commit suicide after knowing affair of man. Smita just threw the paper and moved to sit under the mango tree. At this moment she doesn't want to be with anyone not even Akshita. Her mind is too much clouded. She recalled the news in the paper. Her story is nothing different than others. Everyday newspaper filled with such kind of news.

"If we  can't love someone shouldn't we let them go. Is it necessary to hurt others?" she wondered.
"Why we hurt others when we have options to be cordial?We all  hurt each other and makes life miserable. What a man want from a woman? She questioned herself. People are  ditching honest loyal partners on one hand and beating independent woman on the other hand.

"Ma'am you have a call to attend." maid handed her phone to talk. Smita took it reluctantly as this is mansion's phone

"Hello"

"Hello Smita, how are you?" the familiar voice of Sidra came. She is her fellow teacher and friend few years ago. After her marriage she shifted to chennai with her husband. She is silent and constant support Smita needs all this years

"I am good...

" No, you are not.. "she declared." Smita what is wrong with you? We can talk. I am here to listen. "She encourage her to talk." You know I won't judge you no matter how ugly the thing is. "she said again and tears start flowing from her eyes. Her voice choked with tears and Sidra doesn't hang up.

" We'll solve anything Smita, just told me what happened. "she gave her strength.

" I don't know Sidra what is wrong with me. Since last night I can't feel like myself. You know about my depression but this is much more worse.In that phase I was hopeless towards life,always focusing on negative aspects of life but now I can't feel anything. I feel something is dead inside me. Tears flows from my eyes but I don't feel any pain. It feels a film is running around me where I am only mute spectator. I feel dejected and alienated from life "Smita said and Sidra's mouth dried after listening this shocking information. She wants to run to Smita for help but she is helpless. She is listening all  this from miles away from her friend.Being a wife of a psychiatrist she knew Smita need medical attention but she didn't know how to do it.

"Smita, it'll pass too. Bad or good everything is pass with time." she said to console  sobbing Smita.

"but I don't feel anything. I am puzzled."

"You are wrong my friend. You can feel in this stage too. You are not jombie, you are as alive as any other human." She tried to give her some hope.

"But Sidra..

" Listen, tell me where are you? "

" I am in garden. "Smita sighed.

" Just close your eyes for two minutes and don't cheat and tell me what your senses told. "Sidra used a technique her husband once blurted in a heated conversation.

" cool breeze, chirping of a single bird,temple bell ringing. "

" See, you can feel. You felt cool breeze on your skin, you notice chirping of a single bird, a temple bell rang somewhere."

"but this is physical factors. My heart felt empty after last night."

"and what happened to last night?"Sidra asked cleverly." Its necessary to vacant your heart to someone. When you pour your heart it lessen the pain to some extent if not solve. "Sidra tried her level best although she did not need. She has option to back out from personal problems of her friend but she stayed. She stayed because its necessary to listen sometimes. Sometimes your mere presence can change the future of someone.

" He touched me. "

" He? "

" Akshay touched me. "

" and you don't like his touch. Is it a bad touch? "

" That is my problem Sidra. I loved his touch, his attention made me feel alive but last night..

" What happened to last night Smita. Common tell me."

"Last night...

" Yes, Smita, speak, speak about it.

"Last night my body betrayed me" Smita sobbed loudly. Her sobs instilled fear in Sidra.

"Is he forced himself on you?" Sidra mellowed down tone of words. She didn't used marital rape as it will break Smita's confidence further.

"Last night he disciplined me like a school girl. He hits me on the bottom 20 times and then cherished my body. He is very attentive. He touched every spot of my body which aroused me and I came so hard. Its strongest of my entire life." Smita buried her face in her knees. She is ashamed of herself not just for receiving punishment but pleasure her body experienced there after.

" We do not enjoy our rape, do we? "

Sidra has no answer for her question. She didn't knew how to handle such situation. She is no expert in that field.

"I hate myself for enjoying that humiliation." Smita blurted and threw the phone on ground.
When we are touched by a stranger we repelled our best. Our body understood the danger but when we are touched by a friend or lover there is chaos between mind and soul. Smita's body was familiar with the touch but mind is not ready. Her consent is not for the encounter.

Isn't it wrong?

And if its wrong why law doesn't termed it as a crime. Why its okay to be touched by your spouse without your consent. Why marital rape is allowed but other rape is criminal offence. Why your spouse allowed to do things which is punishable offence otherwise. Isn't love is to cherish each other.
If its not wrong then why it was not accepted wholeheartedly. Why there is self hate after that pleasure? Why she felt that she is ugly all of sudden. His remarks on her that she is always ready for sex with anyone seems true today. She feels she is a whore like he always said. 'A woman ready for sex in any condition.'She slapped herself. She wanted to punish herself for that pleasure.

Author Note - I know its not an intense chapter like earlier chapters but its necessary to show you people what's going on in the mind of characters.