Salvation (Joseph Seed)

18. Repentance

Joseph followed Evelyn out of the compound, hoping that he didn't seem creepy as he walked up behind her. He didn't want to run after her but if he kept walking he wouldn't catch up to her before she reached her house so he decided to call out to her, hoping that she would stop and hear him out.

"Evelyn" Joseph called, but didn't shout, he didn't want to startle the poor girl. That's the last thing he needed to do to her right now.

"Joseph?" Evelyn asked as she stopped walking and turned around to face the familiar voice. She watched him carefully, wondering if he was mad about her kissing him. She knew that it was widely inappropriate, she knew that she shouldn't have done to. Now she just hoped that he wouldn't hold it against her, her biggest fear was that he would ask her to stay away from the church from now on. She found somewhere that made her happy and she couldn't lose that right now, she didn't want to lose Joseph but she understood that it might be too late to prevent that, she would just have to accept it.

"Evelyn, I need to speak with you" Joseph told her with an unreadable look on his face. He continued to approach her until he was standing in front of her.

"I know. You don't have to say anything, I understand. What happened...I didn't mean for it to happen, it was an accident. I don't know, maybe I was just caught up in the moment. I sorry if I-" Evelyn started to ramble and Joseph definitely noticed, he knew that he had calm her down.

"Hey, relax, I'm not upset with you" Joseph assured the woman as he interrupted her, taking her fidgeting hands in his own to stop her from picking at her fingernails. "This isn't your fault...Evelyn, I...I kissed you not the other way around. I only came to talk to you because I wanted to apologise, I didn't want you to think that I'm something that I'm not. But I was in a position of power of you, you trusted me to care for you and protect you, you confessed and bared some of your most painful memories to me, I took advantage of that. I feel incredibly guilty about that and I'm sorry" he apologised, running his thumbs over her knuckles in a comforting manner.

"...no, you don't have to apologise...I-I wanted it, it was mutual. You shouldn't feel guilty about it. I just...I guess I don't really understand why it happened" Evelyn sighed. She never once blamed Joseph for what happened, even though most people would. It was just a kiss, it was innocent.

"That doesn't matter, not now. I just hope that you can forgive me and I hope that it changes nothing about you being here" the Father smiled apologetically. "You're still wearing the necklace I got you" Joseph gave a real smile when he saw the silver chain around her neck.

"Of course I am, I love it. What happened...it doesn't change anything, I still want to be here...I just didn't know whether you would want to talk to me or not" she admitted, smiling slightly back at him.

"I will always want to talk to you, nothing you do could change that" Joseph assured her and once again Evelyn was amazed by this man. Why was he so devoted to her? How did such a strange and strong bond develop between the two of them so quickly?

"But we...we can't do it again..." she told him, adverting her gaze.

"I would never do anything to purposely make you feel uncomfortable or to pressure you into anything. I'm not here to pursue you, I'm here to make things right" he assured her as he let go of her hands and ran his hands up her arms, his hands finally resting on her shoulders.

Evelyn noticed that Joseph never denied being attracted to her, he never denied wanting a different kind of relationship with her, he only said that he wouldn't force her to be a part of that relationship. She wondered whether Joseph would want her if she let him know that she was okay with it, but she was too afraid to ask him about it.

"I'm not mad at you, I was never mad at you, I was mad at myself" Evelyn sighed as she looked up at Joseph, his deep blue eyes putting her at ease.

"You have absolutely no reason to be mad at yourself. Nothing has changed, we can and will go back to normal. Now, let me drive you home" Joseph smiled as he dropped his hands from her shoulders and stepped away slightly.

"You don't have to do that, I can walk" she shook her head. She walked to the church and home again every week, she had no problem with doing it.

"I insist" Joseph smiled, his usual charm and charisma back and that alone made Evelyn smile.

Joseph held out his arm, waiting for the woman's answer. Evelyn just smiled before gently wrapping her hand around his elbow, letting him walk her back towards his car.

John and Jacob stood at the gates of the compound, watching their brother speaking with Evelyn. They couldn't hear what they were saying but they could see how close Joseph got to her, how he took her hands in his, how he made her smile, how she took his arm as he led her towards his car.

Jacob crossed his arms over his chest and shifted his weight to the other foot as he looked down at his youngest brother. John sighed as he looked back up at Jacob, the two brothers sharing a knowing look but neither spoke about what they were thinking. Don't question the Father.

John just nodded at his oldest brother before turning and walking back into the compound, ready to return home for the day. Jacob spared one last glance at Joseph and Evelyn, who were still walking towards the car together, he just sighed before unfolding his arms and following John back into the compound.