Salvation (Joseph Seed)

16. Abstinence

This chapter contains NSFW content, nothing too descriptive. But if it makes you feel uncomfortable, you could probably skip this chapter.

After collecting his thoughts, Joseph left his church and returned home. He knew that Evelyn had probably gone home and was cursing his name for everything that he had just done during her confession. She was vulnerable, she opened up to him and he took advantage of that.

Joseph knew that dwelling on the problem wouldn't help, he could only apologise and make things right when he next saw her. For now, he had to put it to the back of his mind and focus his mind on something more practical.

Once he got home, Joseph shut himself in his office and sat at his desk. Grabbing his note book and a pen, he started to work on his next sermon, something that spoke to each of his followers and those who held the same values as he did.

Only minutes had gone by before Joseph realised that he was lost in his thoughts, he brought himself back into reality before looking down at his note book to see that he had written Evelyn's name. He sighed to himself, he just couldn't get this woman out of his head. Everything about her seemed to fill his mind, every little detail and Joseph knew that it was wrong but he just couldn't help it.

Instead of repressing his thoughts, he indulged them. Sin must be exposed so that it can be absolved.

Joseph pushed his notebook and pen away from him before leaning forward in his chair, placing his head in his hands as he let his mind wander to Evelyn.

Joseph thought about Evelyn, everything about her. The way that she looked up at him through her thick lashes, the green of her doe eyes, just the look in her eyes whenever she looked at him. The fullness of her lips and the way that they parted ever so slightly. The light pink on her cheeks when he spoke to her. The way her long dark hair fell over her face and the way that she tucked it behind her ears.

That's when his mind wandered to how she looked today in the dress he had given to her. The way that she looked while standing in the lake. He tried not to think about it, he really did, but Joseph couldn't help the way that his mind focused on the way the wet material of the white dress clung to Evelyn's body. The way that the dress clung to her accentuated every feminine curve, the white material becoming ever so slightly see through, not leaving much to the imagination.

The image of Evelyn standing in the lake with Joseph's hands on her, stuck in his mind. The scene kept replaying and it sent shivers up his spine, the way that she looked up at him made his chest tighten.

Then his mind wander to the church, how her soft lips felt against his. He had only ever imagined such a feeling, it was like they were made for each other.

Joseph let out a frustrated sigh as he lent back in his chair, only now realising how his jeans had grown considerably tighter. He knew that it was wrong, it was very wrong, it was sinful and he shouldn't...he shouldn't...he shouldn't...but she was just so different...so he did. He couldn't help himself, he just couldn't get the image of Evelyn out of his mind.

Joseph closed his eyes, focusing on the image that was burnt into his mind, as he hesitantly unfastened his belt and the front of his jeans. His head fell back against the chair, a sigh leaving his lips, as he committed a sin that he had abstained from for so long.

It felt wrong, Joseph knew that he shouldn't be doing this, but at the same it felt so good that the fear of damnation had deserted him.

"Evelyn..." the whispered name left Joseph's lips without a thought as he imagined it was her touch rather than his own. Once again he pictured the curves of her body, the softness of her lips, and the way that she looked up at him through her lashes.

-----

Evelyn returned home, a flustered mess. She quickly told her parents that everything had gone fine before hurrying to her bedroom, she just couldn't be around people right now. She closed her bedroom before sitting down on the edge of her bed.

Her lips still tingled from the feel of Joseph's lips, she could still feel the soft brush of his beard against her chin. She could feel his hands caressing her face, she could feel his strong arms wrapped around her body.

Evelyn shifted in a way that she could only describe as uncomfortably as an unfamiliar feeling flooded her body. She crossed her legs, squeezing her thighs together, to easy the strange feeling but she couldn't quite explain why.

A moment of realisation hit her and she felt stupid for not understanding it sooner. Nobody had ever made her feel this way before, not this intensely. It was like her body burned for him. She had been attracted to him, of course, but that kiss had awoken something that she hadn't felt before. Joseph Seed was the pinnacle of abstinence, the leader of the Project, and the face of purity among his followers. Evelyn knew that she shouldn't think of him in such a way, but she could not control these urges.

This was the type of thing that she should confess, that she should seek atonement for, but she didn't plan on doing that. No, Evelyn couldn't bring herself to do that, it was too embarrassing. Either telling Joseph how she felt about him or telling John that she had the hots for his brother, there was just noway she could do that.

Evelyn fell down onto her back, staring up at the ceiling, wondering how to get the charming preacher out of her mind. She squirmed again before screwing her eyes shut, begging herself to ignore the feeling.