Something more

We should wait...im sorry...

The sun starts to set as we head upstairs. Seán goes into his room as I walk in behind him. He sits on the bed. His hoodie still covering his arms "Babe..why do you still have that on?" I ask softly. He looks over at me "I-I don't want you to see....I feel like you'll love me less..,and leave me..." I shake my head as I gently grab one of his arms. I hug it gently and nuzzle it "There is no way, that I could love you less.." he nods a smiles a little. He pulls me close as I sit on his lap. He hugs me tightly as I smile and giggle a little "Your such a dork" he laughs "Thanks nerd" I laugh with him as he lays down, pulling me down with him. His soft hands touching my skin. I smile a little as he nuzzles my neck. He looks up at me..his eyes bright, with a hint of lust. I chuckle softly as I kiss his cheek. Seán closes his eyes and sighs. I curl up on his chest and close my eyes, trying to fall asleep alongside him. He starts to twitch in his sleep. I sit up and stroke his back. He fidgets and whines. I watch in silence ~ I-Is he ok?~ I kiss his cheek softly. His skin cold as ice. I pull the blanket over us and he curls up into a ball. I turn him over so his back is towards me and I hold him. He leans into me and I nuzzle him gently. I take his hand and put my fingers through them. The clock ticks, it echos in my ears ~Just need time...then it'll be ok...~ I nods as I fell myself this. Over, and over...and over. He turns to me, he faces me and his eyes open slowly. He looks into my eyes "Hello love" he smiles and I kiss him gently "You have a bad dream?" He looks at me with concern, his eyebrows furrow "H-How did you know?" "Well..you were twitching and whining..you looked miserable" he nods slightly "Yeah...it was kind of bad.." I nod as I sit up "I'll make breakfast ok?" He grabs my hand and pulls me down "No don't leave meee!" He whines. I laugh as I gently come back. I crawl on top of him and rest my head on his chest. He smiled and hugs me, his sleeves still rolled down. I gently take his arm and pull his sleeves up. His hands start to shake a bit "I-I..." I give a soft smile "It's ok love....I am in love with you because your you..,you change for no one and I love that's bout you" he allows me to continue and I take his bandages off. I set them aside and hug his arm softly. He holds in tears and smiles "I love you so much..,you don't have to help me with this but..here you are and I am so grateful for that...I'm grateful for you..the love of my life" Seán leans in and kisses me slowly. I raise myself and bring myself higher on him. He smiles and sits up, me on his lap facing him. He deepens the kiss and my cheeks start to feel hot. My face turning an unnoticeable shade of pink. I put my hands unintentionally on his arms. He pulls away, wincing and shaking "Sorry love...we should wait ok? And don't feel bad because I'm not ready yet either" I look at him with a arms smile. he smiles back at me. "Thank you for understanding babe" I blush and nod "No problem"I still sit on his lap, curling up and him wrapping his arms around me. I glance at the clock "9:00pm" he looks over at sean who is happily playing with my hair. I smile and peck his lips "Seán love we gotta sleep.." he nods and sighs "I don't wanna go to work though..." he whines cutely. His eyes like a puppy's. Shaking my head I get off of him and gets up "Wait where are you going?" I smile "To bed.." he takes my arm and pulls me towards him "Well then go to sleep" I blush and nods. I slowly sit on the bed and Seán pushes me, laying me down. He laughs and lays next to me, holding me close. I hold onto him tightly. Again, the familiar clock putting both of us in a trance. My head spirals into nothingness when all of a sudden...Seán appears. We are surrounded in darkness..nothing but a void. A slight wind hits my face. Seán stands reasonably far and looks up at me. His hoodie big on him and covering himself. I step closer only to find out I didn't move. He rolls up his sleeves, gushing blood with multiple deep cuts. I sprint towards him, but he just seems farther the more I run. His eyes lock with mine and he collapses on the floor, he looks at me, eyes pleading. His hands shake and tremble as he sits on the floor, knees bent. He cries by his face stays serious, not a single hint of sadness in his face. Only regret and suffering. Tears streaming down his ace he opens his moths, "Y/N...Help me" he whispers as blood comes out of his mouth and eyes, I cry uncontrollably, hyperventilating and shaking like mad. My physical actions take the toll outside of the dream realm. But...I didn't know it was a dream..I thought it was real.. I look up once more, seeing Seán in the same position. Broken, suffering, pleading....dying. I try and help but it isn't enough. I can't get to him. Out of the realm, my hands tighter and Seán wakes up. He breathes hard and looks at me, looking like I'm dying. He shakes me, and I don't wake up. He panics and kisses me softly and deeply. I wake up. My eyes open frantically. I see Seán, his beautiful, worried face. He hugs me tightly "Ate you ok?!" His voice broken and cracked. I hold him tightly in my arms "I'm fine..Are you?" He looks up at me "Why wouldn't I be?" Shaking my head, I give a soft smile "Just a dream" I think to myslef ~ The worst dream I've had in my entire life~ he nods and hugs me. Seán nuzzles my cheek and I feel his cold tears. I kiss him and smiles "Don't worry anymore okay?"