Hunting Sunsets

Forty

I couldn't take it anymore. After the rough day I've had, I couldn't go home to Troy's dorm again or sneak into my house to avoid my brother. I needed someone to hold me; someone to let my rest my head on their shoulder and cry. But not just anyone. I needed one person specifically and to get that I would have to accept our mutual fuck ups and move on together. A part of me didn't want to, but it was also becoming increasingly apparent the more time we spent apart that I needed Smith in my life or I would fucking collapse. He was my breath of fresh air when I was trapped in the middle of the ocean drowning. Smith made everything better and I couldn't give that up because he protected his friend's secret. His character and motives were too kind and caring for me to use that against him. Though I intended on making it perfectly clear that in the future he was to tell me everything or this would never work out.

And that's how I ended up at Smith's apartment later classes and practice, shockingly knocking on his door. My knees were practically knocking together as the silent seconds ticked by, taunting me. Was it too late for us to fix this? Had I sacrificed everything for nothing? Smith was my end all be all. I don't think anyone will ever understand me the way Smit does, significant other or not.

The sound of the doorknob clicking in my eardrums was terrifying. The deep vibrations of Smith's voice are even more nausea inducing. "She's not here. She left me. I told you that, so if you're going to curse me out again then just go home, Ja-" the words died on the volleyball player's lips when his deep brown eyes landed on my small frame in his doorway. His lips closed automatically, debating what he should say while also searching my expression for signs that something was seriously wrong.

"I didn't leave you. I said I just needed space."

"You haven't spoken to me in over a week. I honestly don't know where we stand right now," he spoke honestly, still eying my features with reluctance. "You were pretty pissed at me and I still don't know if you'll ever get past that because in all honesty, I'm not sorry because I would do the same thing over again." Smit had an unwavering loyalty and I had to respect that. If he was on your side, he would never even think of abandoning you. That's why a fight between Jake and I was so dangerous. We were a triangle of tension, and one of us would always be caught in the middle.

"I know that. You're loyalty is one of the traits I admire most about you." I'd said it since before I even met Jade; Smith would get beaten and bloodied in the fight just to protect his dumb ass friends without any questions asked. He was as selfless as they came. "And I love Jake too but you are in a relationship with me, not him. I am the one that's going to be there at the end of a rough day, I am the one that's going to stay with you and I am the one that's going to be your family. We can love Jake as much as we want, but we both have to face an ultimatum. It's him or us. I'm a fucking hypocrite for saying it, and I know that, but I'm starting to realize there's no other choice."

"You have to commit to me, Smith, or this is never going to work. There is no more keeping Jakes secrets from each other on either one of our parts. We have to be loyal to one person and one person only. That's the only way this will work between us, Smith. And believe me, I want this to work more than anything. I've been a fucking wreck without you and it's only been a week." There was weight behind my eyes, something I couldn't help but resent. It was a reminder of the emotional turmoil I was in. "Choose me, Smith."

For months he had tried to win me over but oh how the tables have turned. I would get on my knees and kiss his feet if he asked me to, because I just wanted him back. I wanted everything to be okay and to be in Smith's arms was the only way that could happen.

Smith looked at me for a long time. I thought time had legitimately stopped, he was staring at me with his mocha irises for so long. It was like slow motion that his lips parted, his deep, rich tone reaching my ears. "It was always going to be you, Meave."

Was.

I could hear my heart breaking, but I deserved it. I had put everyone though so much shit for my own pleasure and now I was finally getting what I deserved. I'm just sorry I had to drag all of my loved ones through this. "But you play the same damn game," Smit continued. "Jake was the barrier you shoved between us for over a year. You kept us apart the same way he did. I was always the one that waited for you. I was always the one that was trying to get us together. I truly believe you love me, Maeve. But you also love Jake just as much, of not more. I can't even begin to imagine what position you're in but I can tell you how I feel. Right now I feel like this is the beginning or the end, and that's your choice."

"Please, Smith. You've given me so many chances but I just need one more. I shouldn't have put all the blame on you, and I am truly sorry. I won't apologize for blaming you, though; that is the one thing I will not do. Trust me, I'm ready to get on my hands and knees and worship the ground you walk on, but I will not say that the blame doesn't lie on both of our shoulders," I told him honestly. I was a bitch but I also knew when I was wrong. That being said, I didn't believe I was solely at fault. We did this.

"I don't want you to do that," Smith muttered, looking down at me from our foot height difference. "I know I need to be more honest with you. I am not sorry I was loyal to Jake. Now that we're together, I know where my priorities need to be, because I want this to go the distance. I love you, Meave, and a week or two apart isn't going to change that."

"I'm sorry I walked away. I shouldn't have done that," I told Smith truthfully. In that moment I knew I needed to walk away to make sure I didn't say something I regretted, but I know it hurt Smit. I shouldn't have done that. "I shouldn't have ignored your texts and calls. It was childish and I know that. I'm so sorry, Smith. This entire time I've been acting like it's just me that has all this pressure in two directions but you do too. And I'm so fucking sorry I was too stupid to acknowledge that. I love you and I want to be with you for the rest of my life."

The air had changed between us. All I felt was the same infatuation I had always held for Smith, and I wouldn't change it for the world. I loved Jake, but I had to make myself happy before him. I would give anything to heal his addiction but that's not how it worked. I refused to put all three of us through more pain for no benefit.

I loved Smith and nothing could change that.

The towering Korean smiled, his pearly teeth on show as he leaves down to me in his all his glory, closing the gap between our lips as I grinned right back.

I'm assuming he accepted my apology.

As the slow, passionate kiss ended, my hand stayed on his shoulders, keeping his face at my height. I smirked at him, "Can you get mad at me again just for like, another hour? I really want you to fuck the shit out of me."

Smith laughed, his teeth momentarily biting the inside of his lip in amusement and thought. "I don't need to be mad at you too have fucked up sex," he laughed. "But you know I still have some feelings brewing about you and Owen."

"Good because I have some feelings about that bitch sucking your dick at that party."

"Perfect."

Smith Kyoh was perfect. He was the pink sun setting on the waves in the middle of the ocean, always out of reach but always surrounding. I had finally caught him, I just needed to keep him

Ah four chapters left! I hope you guys are ready!